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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Sen. Jim Justice said the GOP can "forget" reclaiming the Senate in 2028 after Democrats flipped at least eight seats in their historic blue wave midterm.
Incoming House Minority Leader Rep. Jim Jordan vows to maximize the GOP's lame-duck legislative agenda before Democrats take congressional control.
Daniel Jones admitted he's frustrated after the Colts dealt Quenton Nelson, DeForest Buckner, Keenan Allen, and Josh Downs in a two-week sell-off.
War of words between Michigan Wolverines-Oregon Ducks heats up as Dan Lanning responds to criticisms
Kyle Whittingham took aim at Oregon's $50M+ NIL spending, and Dan Lanning fired back with a pointed jab at Michigan's costly coaching buyouts.
Jacob Misiorowski was the first Cy Young Award and World Series winner in the same season since Randy Johnson, while Cam Schlittler's first full season resulted in the award.
Calvin Ridley said he took his keys from a Nashville airport valet's hand during a late-night dispute over a missing ticket, and the valet claimed a broken finger.
Five former Mayors for a Guaranteed Income coalition members won higher office, raising questions about direct cash assistance becoming permanent policy.
A suspected 61-year-old DUI driver was arrested on three murder counts after a North Hollywood crash killed three women and injured two others.
DHS says a twice-deported Honduran national won asylum claiming transgender persecution before allegedly trying to storm a United Airlines cockpit.
Puka Nacua sprained his MCL and PCL and sustained turf toe, and Los Angeles Rams head coach Sean McVay said he will be out for an extended period of time.
Satire
The end is officially near, as Democrats' midterm wins have swept them back into power, giving America — and indeed freedom itself — mere days left to live. Fortunately, you still have time to enjoy some of life's sweetest liberties before democracy dies.
PHILADELPHIA, PA — One of the sports world's brightest stars suffered a significant health scare on Tuesday night, as LeBron James was forced to press his Life Alert button after falling during a game.
LUBBOCK, TX — A drummer in a local megachurch praise band was horror-stricken after he accidentally summoned a demon while attempting to play in 6/8 time.
BLOOMINGTON, MN — Local man Max Carter announced he is 100% ready for a civil war even though he needs his wife's permission to go golfing.
ANAHEIM, CA — What had looked to be a promising career in the food service industry was abruptly cut short on Wednesday, as a local Taco Bell employee was fired for passing his drug test.
OVERLAND PARK, KS — A local baby was relieved to have narrowly avoided life-threatening danger last month by making it out of his mother's womb before Democrats won the midterm elections.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the midterm elections now over and the nation's capital preparing for the incoming Democratic control of the legislative branch, Republicans announced a new plan to do exactly the same thing and expect different results.
As America has changed over the centuries, so too has one of its most majestic symbols. Here is how the U.S. flag has evolved.
The post Evolution Of The U.S. Flag appeared first on The Onion.
THE HEAVENS—Noting that the change would take effect immediately for all 8.2 billion of His earthly creations, God Almighty, Our Heavenly Father, announced Monday that cutting hair would hurt now. “Going forward, cutting any hair on your body, from your head to your pubic region, will result in
ORLANDO, FL—Noting that there was “just something about him” and that he possessed the kind of innate physical tools that could not be taught, basketball scouts confirmed Friday that they saw tremendous potential in 7-foot-5 toddler Miles Covington. “I know talent, and this kid has that ‘
Google announced that schools which block AI use entirely would have their access to web search restricted, a move meant to curb growing calls to ban artificial intelligence in K-12 education. What do you think?
The post Google Withholds Search For Schools That Ban AI appeared first on The Onion.
Elon Musk announced that Tesla will cease production of the Cybertruck in 2027, diverting resources to increase manufacturing of the company’s self-driving taxi, the Cybercab. What do you think?
The post Cybertruck Discontinued appeared first on The Onion.
Support for unions in the United States is the highest it’s been in decades, prompted by the rise of AI and income inequality. The Onion examines the pros and cons of labor unions. PRO They’re the only reason you’re not handcuffed to a mine cart right now. They’re the best way to get over a
LOS ALTOS HILLS, CA—Ranting at length as he shared details about his stressful work life, NVIDIA CEO Jensen Huang reportedly vented to his new Russian girlfriend Tuesday about the ongoing corporate investigation into his conduct at the company. “I’m telling you, Svetlana, you have no idea the
The post Is Violence Becoming Too Political? appeared first on The Onion.
SEATTLE—With its announcement of a new technology that company executives touted as the future of online shopping, retail giant Amazon confirmed Thursday that it would launch a new fleet of drones that continuously hover above potential customers until they order something. “This fully electric
Sports
The Broncos announced late Wednesday that their trade to acquire linebacker Daiyan Henley from the Chargers "will not be finalized."
Stephen Curry injured his right abdomen in the first quarter, with Steve Kerr saying after the game that the "concern is high" as they await test results.
Philip Rivers is set to return to NC State, this time as head football coach, once its trustees finalizes his contract after a meeting Friday, sources said.
Zion Williamson called for accountability after the Pelicans lost their fourth straight game, saying the team needed to look itself in the mirror.
Milwaukee's Jacob Misiorowski and New York's Cam Schlittler capped dominant 2026 seasons by sweeping all 30 first-place votes to win their respective Cy Young Awards.
Kirk Cousins has rejoined the Vikings after not quite three years away, relishing his familiarity with the Twin Cities area, the people in the organization.
Rockets guard Marcus Smart threw a right hook Wednesday night that grazed the nose of Warriors center Charles Bassey in the third quarter of Houston's win.
In a season where several big-name programs are struggling, Michigan is the latest to lay an egg.
Bulls first-round pick Caleb Wilson injured his right hand in the third quarter quarter of Wednesday's loss to the Spurs and did not finish the game.
Breaking down UCLA's fourth recruit of the class, plus more big women's basketball recruiting decisions for 2027-28.
Day 2 of the MLB GM meetings gave us super agent Scott Boras talking up his clients in the way only he knows how.
Frankie Muniz, known for his role in "Malcolm In The Middle," is "awake and alert" after crashing in practice at Daytona.
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The Bears won in Week 9, but it didn't look pretty. Was that enough for the Bills or 49ers to take the top spot in Tom Brady's power rankings.
Jacob Misiorowski won the National League Cy Young Award on Wednesday night after helping the Milwaukee Brewers win their first World Series title while setting a new standard for velocity by a starting pitcher.
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Kirk Cousins has rejoined the Minnesota Vikings after not quite three years away, with the familiarity and comfort providing a welcomed boost for his preparation this week to play the Green Bay Packers.
Mississippi State star quarterback Kamario Taylor is finalizing a massive deal to return to Starkville in 2027.
Tech
These Arctic currents have never broken down so early in the season. Combined with an unprecedented El Niño, the outcomes aren’t easy to predict.
Save on rowers and accessories with Hydrow coupons, including an exclusive discount of $50.
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Discover how to save on Ring cameras, doorbells, outdoor cameras, and more.
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Check out our deals for Nike this October 2026, including 15% off select purchases.
Score discounts on blenders, food processors, immersion blenders, and more with our selection of Vitamix coupons and deals.
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The company was throttling speeds for plans offered under the Affordable Broadband Act.
The airline believes AI poses security risks and may violate DOT and FAA rules.
The chatbot was already available through the Google Maps app.
The Chinese company wants to compete with Meta's Muse.
Thanks to SpaceX's unique approach to testing, the answer isn't so clear-cut.
Bob Lee died from multiple stab wounds in 2023.
This is an attempt to "win another hour per user, per month."
The company will stop selling video doorbells, its home monitoring system and other products.
Europe's Digital Fairness Act targets digital practices that harm children and push people into spending more.
Microsoft's upscaling tech for video games is now officially available for select Xbox Ally machines, as well as some other Copilot+ PCs.
Entertainment
Canadian actress Laine MacNeil was just 13 years old when she played Patty Farrell -- the mean, competitive teacher's pet and Greg Heffley's bully -- in the 2010 family/comedy film "Diary of A Wimpy Kid." Patty hit the big screen with Zachary…
Late businessman Ted Turner was married and divorced three times during his life ... but the final version of his will made no mention of his last and legendary ex-wife, Jane Fonda ... TMZ has learned. Ted’s children, Laura, Robert, Rhett, Reed…
Zac Affleck is taking responsibility for his past behavior toward estranged wife Jen Affleck ... acknowledging his mistakes as the two navigate their divorce and prepare to welcome their fourth child. In a lengthy statement posted to his Instagram…
Florida Governor Ron DeSantis signed off on a death warrant for Willie Seth Crain Jr., a man convicted of kidnapping and murdering a 7-year-old girl in 1998 ... whose body has never been found. Crain is now scheduled to be executed on December 10,…
Frankie Muniz is out of the hospital after a scary incident during practice at Daytona International Speedway. The “Malcolm in the Middle” star confirmed he’s been released from the hospital following the incident while preparing for Ford’s…
Looks like Jensen Huang's about to be out as Nvidia CEO ... amid reports of a rumored second affair with an exec who reported to him. People familiar with the matter told The Wall Street Journal the board is planning to meet ASAP to discuss ousting…
Anthony Clark, the comedian and actor best known for starring in the CBS sitcom "Yes, Dear," has died, according to his former costar Mike O'Malley. O'Malley announced the news Wednesday on X, writing, "Anthony Clark died yesterday. He was a…
Jason Sudeikis and Olivia Wilde's former nanny lost all of her claims against the actors in a lengthy arbitration battle … TMZ has learned. According to court documents obtained by TMZ ... Jason and Olivia have filed a petition asking a New York…
Ariana Grande is stepping back into the spotlight ... and she's bringing boyfriend Ricky Álvarez along for the ride as they make their red carpet debut! The couple hit the carpet together at the world premiere of "Focker-in-Law" ... marking a…
"The Real Housewives of Atlanta" star Angela Oakley is being accused of hurling a homophobic slur at a man … and harassing him for years ... TMZ has learned. A man named Alexander Hines filed a police report with the Atlanta Police…
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