Personalize Your Own Homepage
Login
Create Account
US News
• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
The Philadelphia 76ers were fined $100,000 by the NBA for violating injury reporting rules regarding Joel Embiid's availability against the Atlanta Hawks on Sunday.
A documentary screening in Manhattan exposed UNRWA's alleged ties to Hamas while NYC's incoming mayor Zohran Mamdani supported the controversial U.N. agency through a Gaza fundraiser.
Famed biologist Richard Dawkins endorsed Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling's latest social media comments criticizing transgender ideology and speech policing.
Jodie Foster reveals traumatic childhood memory of her puppy's death before "Taxi Driver" premiere at Cannes in 1976, believing she traded what she loved for success.
Miley Cyrus and Maxx Morando are engaged after four years together. The two met on a blind date and have kept their relationship largely private over the years.
Miami Republican mayoral candidate Emilio Gonzalez is accusing his far-left opponent Eileen Higgins of wanting to “create a city of renters," despite pushing a message of affordability.
Federal charges filed against Oregon man who protested ICE facility, made violent threats against law enforcement officers and their wives in posts.
Melinda Gates, Bill Gates' ex-wife, mourned the loss of diversity, equity and inclusion initiatives as major companies have begun to roll back DEI programs.
Lawmakers debated ICE agents' use of masks and civilian clothing during operations, with Democrats warning the tactics could lead to dangerous confrontations.
FBI Director Kash Patel and Deputy Director Dan Bongino defend bureau reforms after facing harsh criticism from agents in detailed internal report.
Satire
EAGAN, MN — In a move intended to better reflect the state's modern demographics and generate more interest in the team from the populace, the Minnesota Vikings announced that they were changing their name to the Minnesota Somali Pirates.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Americans received further proof that their president remained laser-focused on nothing but leading the country, as Donald Trump's Spotify Wrap revealed that he listened to "God Bless the USA" 160,000 times this year.
ISTANBUL — In a remarkable moment of Church history, leaders of the Catholic and Orthodox Churches have come together to officially denounce Wham's "Last Christmas".
With accusations flying of war crimes on the high seas, you may find yourself asking: what really constitutes a war crime? Let us help unpack this complex issue and break down what does and doesn't make someone a war criminal:
BOULDER, CO — Local woman Denise Manthei fulfilled the Great Commission today by purchasing a mug proclaiming that all she needs is coffee and Jesus.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In addition to calling for Secretary of War Pete Hegseth to resign due to his oversight of military drone strikes against drug boats, Democrats also accused Luke Skywalker of war crimes for using more than one proton torpedo against the Death Star.
SPOKANE, WA—Lamenting that she still hadn’t found the bug-eyed man-child of her dreams, area bachelorette Louise Perkins confirmed Tuesday that she was growing tired of constantly looking for Mr. Bean. “It seems like all my friends are settling down with buffoonish, mishap-prone men, but no ma
SILVER SPRING, MD—Praising the drug’s ability to quickly and effectively increase fatalities amongst the nation’s opioid users, the U.S. Food and Drug Administration approved a new nasal spray Wednesday capable of reversing the effects of Narcan. The compound, called noroxone, was reportedly a
You used to dream of couch-surfing across the world, untethered and unbothered, and now here you are, seriously considering an HOA townhouse. Reference #17806
The post Look Who You’ve Become appeared first on The Onion.
After years of planning their wedding, the pair were united in marriage within an hour of the bride being legally able to consent.
The post Elisa Geoffries and Daniel Walter appeared first on The Onion.
The Department of Transportation is considering a new crash test dummy design based on female anatomy, claiming it would improve safety testing for women. What do you think?
The post Transportation Department Endorses Crash Test Dummies That Resemble Women appeared first on The Onion.
It's Christmas time again, and if you're a megachurch pastor (or one of the 38 members of the pastoral staff), you know that a few robes and cardboard cut-outs of animals won't cut it. You have to take it up a notch. Or a hundred notches.
A judge in Missouri resigned after wearing an Elvis Presley wig in court, coming after a disciplinary commission determined he failed to maintain order and decorum. What do you think?
The post Judge Resigns After Wearing Elvis Wig In Court appeared first on The Onion.
SPRINGFIELD, VA — As the Department of Homeland Security sought to tighten security across the board for travelers around the country, the Transportation Security Administration announced that anyone who doesn't acquire a Real ID by the appointed deadline will be sent to a screening line manned by
BLOOMINGTON, IN — Local mother Sheila Dunn was reportedly treated to a spontaneous deep-tissue back massage when her five-year-old kid began kicking her back in the middle of the night.
U.S. — In addition to preventing people from entering the United States from various nations around the world, the White House revealed on Tuesday that Minnesota had been added to President Trump's third-world travel ban.
Francine Holmes, 73, passed away Wednesday after three hours of successful surgery followed by four hours of unsuccessful surgery.
The post Francine Holmes appeared first on The Onion.
CHICAGO—In a move making her the latest performer to join the distraction-free trend, New Zealand singer-songwriter Lorde confirmed Friday that she was now requiring all concertgoers to stash their boyfriends in locked pouches during her shows. “I understand wanting to share the experience, but
HILLIARD, OH—Reluctantly admitting to the table that she might have been too quick to judge, local mother Janet Greenbaum told family members Thursday that she was actually quite impressed by the manners of their tattooed restaurant server. “When she first came over to give us our menus, I thou
Rosalía’s fourth studio album, Lux, has been met with critical acclaim, cracking the Billboard top 10 for the first time in the Spanish pop star’s career. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the artist. Genre: Música Musical Influences: Traditional Spanish TikToks Who She’s Be
Sports
Tom Brady, Wayne Gretzky, Aaron Judge and Shaquille O'Neal will serve as draw assistants at the 2026 FIFA World Cup draw on Friday.
Alexi Lalas joins Colin Cowherd to discuss the current state of the USMNT, Christian Pulisic’s form, and the upcoming draw of the 2026 FIFA World Cup.
NBA insiders break down the first Power Rankings of December, evaluating all 30 teams as the end of the year draws near.
NBA execs weigh in on the players' trade value amid challenging seasons.
New research helps explain why players get off to such slow starts after swapping teams.
Check out this article for a complete college football playoff schedule, and more!
Check out this article for information about the 2026 NFL Pro Bowl Games schedule, how to vote, how to watch, and more!
Check out this article for a complete list of 2025 College Football Conference Championship Games, including dates, times, how to watch, and more.
Check out this article for a list of NFL teams eliminated from the NFL playoffs, as well as a list of teams on the bubble.
At F1's season finale, McLaren's parallels to past heartbreaks are hard to ignore as Max Verstappen's long-shot title bid doesn't look so far fetched.
Two Steelers legends have joined the chorus of voices calling for the franchise to move on from Mike Tomlin, with Ben Roethlisberger even suggesting that Tomlin is a good fit for the vacant Penn State job.
Compare the best DFS apps for 2025. Explore reviews of UnderDog, DraftKings, Sleeper, and more, including bonuses, features, and contest types.
We're tracking the latest on what's happening around the NFL heading into Week 14 of the 2025 season.
The FIFA World Cup draw is happening Friday, and 42 of the 48 teams are confirmed. But what's one thing you need to know about each nation?
Puma has revealed the jersey that Portugal will wear at next summer's FIFA World Cup.
Here's the latest on what's happening around college football entering Week 15.
Ohio State offensive coordinator Brian Hartline has been named the new head coach at South Florida, the school announced Wednesday.
While the NHL is concerned about the status of the ice hockey arena for the Olympics, sources said there are no indications the league would pull out of the event - despite reports that the ice arena surface is about 3 feet too short.
Trying to make sense of the playoff picture conference by conference with less than a week to go.
Compare the best sports betting apps and sites for 2025. See reviews, bonuses, and features to help choose the right sportsbook for your needs.
Tech
The developer of Cozy Grove and Alphabear is leaving Netflix. Spry Fox is being sold back to its original founders, Game File reports, and will continue to work on its upcoming "cooperative village life sim" Spirit Crossing as an independent company. Unlike other shuttered Netflix games studios Team
It's time for the annual Rockefeller Christmas tree lighting! The Christmas in Rockefeller Center tree lighting special will air tonight, Dec. 3 from 8-10 PM ET — though coverage will start an hour prior, at 7 PM ET. The Voice and Happy's Place star Reba McEntire will host and perform at the Rocke
India will no longer require smartphone makers to preinstall the Sanchar Saathi "security" app. After blowback from Apple, Samsung and opposition leaders, the Modi government issued a statement saying it "has decided not to make the pre-installation mandatory for mobile manufacturers." The app is st
Tencent has agreed to stop promoting and publicly testing Light of Motiram as a lawsuit with Sony works its way through the courts, according to a report by TheGamePost. This is Tencent's game that looks suspiciously similar to Sony's Horizon franchise, so much so that Sony sued the publisher.
Sony
The Chinese video game giant Tencent is now building some of the world’s best 3D AI models. This could have implications far outside gaming.
Micron Technology is winding down its consumer-facing Crucial brand to focus on providing RAM and other components to the AI industry, The Wall Street Journal reports. The company plans to continue shipping Crucial RAM and storage through February 2026, and will honor warranty service and support fo
With a good virtual private network (VPN), you can stream TV shows and events from all over the world, protect your information from hackers and thwart those online trackers that watch you sleep and show you weird personalized ads. Although we strongly recommend using a VPN, you shouldn't jump on ju
Russia has blocked the popular gaming platform Roblox, according to a report by Reuters. The country's communications watchdog Roskomnadzor accused the developers of distributing extremist materials and "LGBT propaganda." The agency went on to say that Roblox is "rife with inappropriate content that
Amazon’s Black Friday and Cyber Monday sales might be over, but the company is still running a deal on its premium music streaming service. Right now, you can get three months of Amazon Music Unlimited for free if you’re a new subscriber.
As with most offers of this nature, your subscription wi
Indie studio Santa Ragione is facing more strife after claiming its latest game has been blocked on another major storefront. The developer previously said it was at risk of closure after Valve banned Horses from Steam, noting that it would be very difficult to recoup its investment without access t
The best opportunity to view this spectacle will be shortly after sunset on December 4.
This time of year has a lot of merry and bright things to be excited about, but it can be stressful if you’re stumped on what to get your mom, dad, best friend, coworker or kids’ teacher as a holiday gift. Whether you enjoy or dread buying gifts for people, it’s safe to say we all want to give
The Trump administration has been virtually begging immigrants in the US to self-deport, even offering money. But some immigrants say it’s been nearly impossible.
AI-powered startup Fortell has become a secret handshake for the privileged hearing-impaired crowd who swear by the product. Now, it wants to be in your ears.
Looking for a smart speaker that can do more than just talk back to you? These smart displays can stream your favorite shows, join a video call, and even double as a digital photo frame.
ARMR Sciences of New York is trialing a vaccine in the Netherlands to protect against fentanyl-related overdose and death.
From personalized gifts to business essentials, WIRED can help you save with our selection of VistaPrint promo codes.
Get 10% off your next website with an exclusive Squarespace discount code, with up to 50% off plans, new AI design features, and more top discounts this December.
Save up to 50% today with the latest Home Depot coupons for appliances, power tools, and more holiday deals this December.
Stream your favorite shows for up to $80 off this December, and save on subscription plans with the latest Peacock TV coupons from WIRED.
Entertainment
Goldie Hawn, Jennifer Lopez, Kerry Washington, and Regina Hall were just some of the iconic actresses to grace the red carpet for The Hollywood Reporter's Women in Entertainment gala Wednesday ... and we have pics from the epic event! Outside,…
Paul Anka has seen it all in his half-century in Hollywood ... and that includes Frank Sinatra's schlong. The legendary singer-songwriter joined us on "TMZ Live" Wednesday and we asked him about his new documentary, his upcoming Broadway show, his…
Irina Shayk is one hot momma ... and she proves it in pics she shared Wednesday -- lucky for you, we've compiled them all into one insanely sexy gallery! Whether it's a star-studded runway or a sea-shelled lined beach -- Irina looks absolutely…
Miley Cyrus is engaged -- and daddy dearest is thrilled, wasting no time blasting out a gushy shout-out to her and new fiancé Maxx Morando to celebrate the happy news! In an IG carousel Wednesday, Billy kicked things off with a shot of himself,…
Aaron Paul is turning to the undefeated internet for backup, asking fans to help track down his hardworking London cabbie ... so he can make the guy’s holiday season a little brighter! The "Breaking Bad" star was en route to France via the…
Jeffrey Epstein's notorious pedophile island is beginning to come into full focus ... the Congressional House Oversight Committee just released never-before-seen photos and videos of Epstein's private island of perversions -- and the footage is…
Matt Rife and Netflix are under fire for his new comedy special ... and parents are blaming the comedian and the streaming service for ruining the magic of Santa Claus. Folks are complaining that when they open the app, Netflix starts auto-playing…
POORSTACY's baby mama has been arrested ... with cops alleging drug use in the presence of the couple's young child in the days before the rapper's death ... and we're learning she and the kid were in the room when the musician killed himself.…
Gilbert Arenas says the Clippers might as well pack their bags and get the hell outta of Los Angeles ... going OFF on the organization for disrespecting Chris Paul by sending him home during his retirement season. The Clippers parted ways with the…
We want you to be a part of TMZ, so every weekday, between 9:30 AM and 11:30 AM PT, we take you inside our newsroom via live stream. You never know what you're gonna get ... a big story that breaks, an argument erupts in the room, or someone's just…
Stocks
Weather
Location is determined by your browser