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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Reps. Mike Lawler and Jamie Raskin clashed over sanctuary city policies at a House Judiciary Committee hearing, trading accusations over illegal immigration.
Jordan Spieth says betting in golf could allow fans to impact outcomes, calling it a problem that needs to be tackled soon ahead of the John Deere Classic.
'Evel: America's Daredevil' chronicles Evel Knievel's rise from Montana copper mines to iconic motorcycle stunts at Caesars Palace and Snake River Canyon.
Zach Werenski's trade request stunned Blue Jackets coach Rick Bowness, who says he was blindsided weeks after the defenseman won the Norris Trophy.
American soccer gatekeepers are reacting to World Cup casual fans the same way the WNBA reacted to the Caitlin Clark boom, policing new audiences.
FBI says U.S. Postal Service employee Michael Thompson was arrested after threatening a mass shooting at a Lubbock, Texas, Pride parade in social media posts.
Islamic Revolutionary Guard Corps forces face deadly attacks across western Iran as clashes spread, raising questions about an escalating Kurdish insurgency amid U.S.–Iran talks.
Reality TV star Kate Gosselin and estranged son Collin clash on social media over alleged abuse ahead of his tell-all memoir out in October.
University of Tennessee settles lawsuit for $1.9 million with professor Tamar Shirinian, who was fired after social media posts about Charlie Kirk's assassination.
Kansas college student drowns after jumping into 'breathtaking' destination with deadly track record
A 21-year-old Wichita State University student drowned after jumping into Blue Pool, a popular Oregon swimming hole where water averages just 37 degrees.
Satire
BRANDENBURG — Missionaries from the greatest country on earth were seen going door to door throughout Europe, spreading the good news of air conditioning.
TOPEKA, KS — Local man Samuel Denton was deeply upset Tuesday afternoon after his device, which is specifically designed to receive phone calls, received a phone call.
NEW YORK, NY — Ranch dressing futures skyrocketed to an unprecedented $120 a barrel on the New York Stock Exchange, officially surpassing crude oil as the world's most valuable liquid asset.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a narrow 5-4 decision, the United States Supreme Court ruled today that any baby born in or within five yards of an Olive Garden restaurant is an Italian citizen.
INDIANAPOLIS, IN - In the most thrilling moment in all of WNBA history, one woman pointed at another woman.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In ruling on whether men can be women, the United States Supreme Court invited esteemed judge and noted woman expert Matt Walsh to author the majority opinion elucidating what, in fact, a woman is.
MIAMI—In an effort to diversify its holdings in the highly competitive militarized surveillance space, data analytics firm Palantir announced Thursday that it had acquired the Pentagon for $800 billion. “After months of negotiating, I am thrilled to announce that the U.S. government has accept
QUANTICO, VA—Alarmed by what he described as the inability of supposedly elite law enforcement officers to approach and seduce attractive women, FBI director Kash Patel confirmed Thursday that he had invited all agents at the bureau to train with professional pickup artists. “The sad fact is th
WASHINGTON—Saying the nation had enjoyed a perfectly adequate amount of dribbling, passing, and loud chanting, a new report published Tuesday confirmed that was enough soccer for now. “Welp, that was fun, but we’ve got our fill,” the report read in part, adding that after a couple weeks of w
A 3-year-old giraffe is missing after escaping a ranch in Texas two weeks ago, with search helicopters turning up nothing. What do you think?
The post Escaped Giraffe Unable To Be Located appeared first on The Onion.
Elaine Gardener’s loved ones can rest easy knowing the 63-year-old passed after having finally completed the Devil’s Dozen Challenge at Sliders Bar & Grill.
The post Elaine Gardener appeared first on The Onion.
The post Last Living Millennial Dies appeared first on The Onion.
TWIN FALLS, ID—Highlighting sensitive areas on the body that when properly manipulated could induce extreme pain, older cousin Noah Horner held a demonstration on new pressure points he had learned since his last visit, nervous sources confirmed Friday. “Check this out—it’s used by IDF sold
WASHINGTON—In a statement that mourned “the extinguishing of one of the league’s oldest and most infernal lights,” the Washington Wizards announced Tuesday that the organization’s founding wizard, Osric the Baleful, had died at age 682, bringing to an end a centuries-long career in necroma
WASHINGTON—In a wide-reaching decision likely to affect every era of American life, the U.S. Supreme Court issued a landmark ruling Tuesday upholding a temporal gerrymander that would cost Democrats control of the House of Representatives in the 1932 election. With the 6-3 judgment, the court’s
MARBLE FALLS, TX — A local church found itself under fire this week after this year's Vacation Bible School theme centered around the biblical book of Judges, complete with lessons on murder by jawbone and swords engulfed in belly fat.
KANSAS CITY, MO — In an achievement unprecedented in the history of Major League Baseball, the Kansas City Royals somehow managed to find a way to lose on a day when they didn't play a game.
LONDON — In an effort to modernize MI6 for the eco-conscious era, the British government announced that the organization had officially granted James Bond a license to kill anyone with an air conditioner.
SILVER SPRING, MD — The National Weather Service issued a weather alert on Monday announcing that tonight, everyone is going to die, or absolutely nothing is going to happen, but it's definitely one of the two.
WASHINGTON—Expressing delight at the complete humiliation of their political opponents, White House officials on Monday gleefully mocked the paltry attendance at Democrats’ Great American State Fair. “To no one’s surprise, the Democrats and their socialist allies botched America’s 250th an
Sports
Serena Williams plays Maya Joint at Wimbledon, in her first singles match in nearly four years. We have updates on all the action here.
Follow live: France, Sweden clash in round-of-32 matchup
Erling Haaland sent Norway into a round-of-16 clash with Brazil by scoring an 86th-minute winner against Ivory Coast in Dallas.
The Supreme Court on Tuesday issued a decision to uphold state laws barring transgender girls and women from playing on school athletic teams.
Major League Baseball and the MLB Players' Association announced a joint $1 million donation Tuesday to aid in recovery from the devastating earthquakes that struck Venezuela last week.
The Portland Trail Blazers and center Robert Williams III have agreed to a three-year, $44 million contract extension, his agent Kevin Bradbury of LIFT Sports Management tells ESPN.
Fourth-seeded Ben Shelton is out after the 1st-round at Wimbledon, falling to Finland's Otto Virtanen 6-4, 6-7 (8), 6-2, 7-6 (9).
The Panthers have acquired goaltender Jacob Markstrom from the Devils as part of a five-player deal, the team announced Tuesday.
We handed out NFL offseason evaluations to all 32 teams, factoring in things such as signings, extensions, trades, draft picks and hirings.
Top-20 rising senior Gabe Nesmith -- cousin of Pacers guard Aaron Nesmith -- committed to Vanderbilt on Tuesday, giving coach Mark Byington the highest-ranked recruit of his career.
Despite a standout 2025 campaign, Dallas Cowboys running back Javonte Williams asserted that he "still" has "a lot more to prove."
Lionel Messi has proven he is a superhero on the pitch for decades, but the legendary Argentine has now taken things a step further by appearing alongside Tom Holland in a viral crossover.
GOAL rates Norway's players from their showdown with the Ivory Coast in Dallas.
Follow the 2026 FIFA World Cup Golden Boot race with our live tracker, featuring the latest goalscoring standings, player statistics, and updates.
The superstars have shined at the 2026 FIFA World Cup so far. Check out the latest Golden Boot odds.
World Cup veteran Walker Zimmerman previews the USA's matchup against Bosnia and Herzegovina.
Twenty-eight years after their last World Cup, Norway just won its first knockout game in history. Here are my takeaways from Norway's 2-1 win over the Ivory Coast.
Erling Haaland scored the deciding goal in the 86th minute for Norway, which won a knockout game at the World Cup for the first time.
Who will Mexico face in the round of 32? Here are the possible opponents, and its potential path to the final.
We're tracking all the scores and results at the FIFA 2026 World Cup.
Tech
The cuts will apparently start next week.
So much for magic.
Apple filed an appeal after being found in contempt of an order related to App Store fees.
You can use any sound you want for an iPhone alarm, and here's how to set it up.
At least for this session, the Stop Killing Games campaign has hit a wall in the California Senate.
The second animated Mario movie made over a billion dollars.
All the Apple products avoiding the price hike (for now)
Extreme heat coupled with humidity will make it feel like 109 degrees Fahrenheit as the holiday weekend approaches.
You can use Gemini to quickly search your Gmail inbox with natural language.
Clicks has released the first hands-on video of its Blackberry like Communicator Android phone.
Don't get hit with the Apple tax.
The original Ninja Slushi has been replaced! The new best slushie machines chill faster and make soft serve.
Bitdefender VPN has an excellent starting price, even if it lacks the advanced features that privacy nerds may want.
For decades, the senator has argued that concentrated wealth threatened American democracy. Now he’s betting that frustration with Big Tech, billionaires, and unchecked AI is reaching a tipping point.
WIRED spent months talking to America’s favorite failson as he plotted his return to public life. Now he’s feeding the trolls—and everyone else.
The maps and images show the extent of destruction and give rescue operations a tool to find any remaining survivors.
Heat pumps are more than just a way to keep your home comfortable without using fossil fuels.
Hundreds of contractors working on a project for Meta pretended to be kids in order to see how other chatbots like Gemini and ChatGPT would respond to high-risk subjects, WIRED found.
WIRED has tested 100-plus bed-in-a-box mattresses for a week each. Our top pick, the Helix Midnight Luxe hybrid, is the best bed you can buy online.
Even if you only use WhatsApp sometimes, you might want to snag your username now to stop giving out your phone number.
Entertainment
Teresa Giudice's daughter, Milania Giudice, was throwing candles and food during a wild outburst that ended with her being arrested for assault ... according to her sister. TMZ has learned police in New Jersey say it was Milania's older sister,…
Rep. Mike Lawler went OFF on Reps Jamie Raskin, Pramila Jayapal, and NY Governor Kathy Hochul ... repeatedly calling them "f**king assholes" for their sanctuary city policies that he says led to the murder of one of his constituents. It was as hot…
NBA big man Walker Kessler just touched down in Los Angeles for a free agency meeting with the Lakers ... and he tells TMZ Sports it would've been great to play with LeBron James, but Luka Doncic and Austin Reaves ain't too shabby!! The 7'2" center…
Madison Square Garden is disappearing behind layers of fabric ... all in the name of Taylor Swift's fairy tale wedding. Sources connected to the wedding setup tell TMZ ... the event crew got to work Monday, and nearly all of the effort so far has…
Looks like Tom Hardy cut a deal with "MobLand" producers ... TMZ confirmed he's returning to the show for its third season, despite some alleged on-set tension. With Tom in the fold, the Paramount+ crime series will not be losing anyone from the…
Darrell Sheets' celebration of life brought out former costars, friends, and family ... and, as you might expect, several notable items from the star's past. Dave Hester -- Darrell's former costar on "Storage Wars" -- shared photos from the event…
Dave Portnoy is taking us back to the "Call Her Daddy" civil war ... and says one alleged plan nearly turned into Barstool's worst nightmare. The Barstool boss swung by "TMZ Live" Tuesday to revisit the podcast breakup that broke the internet ...…
Rep. Lauren Boebert isn't exactly welcoming a fellow Republican back to Congress ... rather, she's skewering him for being MIA because he was depressed. Jacob got the Congresswoman from Colorado Tuesday on Capitol Hill, and she was incredulous that…
Bam Margera says he and the "Jackass" crew may have accidentally landed themselves on Jennifer Aniston's blacklist for life ... thanks to a prank involving her ex-husband Brad Pitt!!! Bam was on the "Living Proof" podcast when he recalled Brad…
Madelyn Cline and influencer Henry Smith have called it quits after just four months of dating ... TMZ has learned. Sources close to the former couple tell TMZ ... Madelyn and Henry remain friendly and the split is amicable. It's a quick end to a…
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