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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Nick Saban says there aren't 24 College Football Playoff teams that can win a title, warning bowl games and the SEC Championship Game face extinction.
Engelbert Humperdinck revealed on his podcast how he tied up a nurse during his 1961 tuberculosis sanatorium stay after painful daily injections.
No. 22 LSU kept their College Football Playoff hopes alive with a dominant win over No. 16 Mississippi State at home on Saturday afternoon.
Cleveland Guardians fans with ALDS Game 5 tickets now face a swap to Game 4 after the rain delay, potentially missing a pennant-clinching moment.
New Jersey resident Jacob Fleig, age 22, jumped nearly 100 feet into the sea at Fiordo di Furore on the Amalfi Coast in Italy and is now in intensive care in Salerno.
Titans CEO Burke Nihill apologized to fans after an 0-5 start, expressing confidence that Robert Saleh and Mike Borgonzi will turn things around.
Robert Kelker-Kelly's wife told police the "Days of Our Lives" actor declined a hospital trip despite his alarming symptoms in his final hours.
Michael Tubbs and Mayors for Guaranteed Income push direct cash payments as the fastest fix for the U.S. affordability crisis amid growing state bans.
Recent incidents of brawls at youth sporting events between coaches and parents raise the real question about who the title of "softest generation" really belongs to.
Three men were sentenced to 158 years each in Ensenada, Baja California, for the murders of surfers Callum and Jake Robinson and Carter Redd Rhoad.
Satire
SAN CLEMENTE, CA — With uncontained wildfires blazing outside Orange County, an updated tally shows that God has pulled back even with Governor Gavin Newsom in the race to destroy California.
In an effort to lower gas prices ahead of the midterm elections, President Trump agreed to temporarily lift sanctions on Russian diesel exports. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the energy deal struck with Russian President Vladimir Putin. Q: What brought the deal about? A: Trump r
TOPEKA, KS — Vexed by the high price of gasoline, local man Aaron Barnett decided to cast his vote for America to start castrating kids again.
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Press Secretary Katie Zacharia dressed up in an adorable lawyer costume for a Halloween party this weekend.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump faced heavy criticism on Friday for replacing White House Press Secretary Katie Zacharia with Jessica Rabbit.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Katie Zacharia was reportedly fired from her role as White House Press Secretary despite lying about her qualifications and being awful at her job.
JUPITER ISLAND, FL — Professional golfer and driving enthusiast Tiger Woods was reportedly unimpressed with the new Tesla Roadster, saying he's flipped dozens of vehicles all by himself.
HADDONFIELD, NJ — Look out, trick-or-treaters! For Halloween this year, the Jenkins family decorated their house as a data center. Spooky!
LOS ANGELES, CA — Hours after being swept out of the playoffs by the Milwaukee Brewers, the Los Angeles Dodgers announced that the organization had purchased the Milwaukee Brewers.
The post ‘Whalefall’ Star Stuns On Red Carpet In 40,000-Gallon Tank appeared first on The Onion.
LOS ANGELES—Stating that it was about time they got serious about their future as a couple, actress Sydney Sweeney reportedly told record executive Scooter Braun Friday that she was open to converting to the B-list for him. “I really want this relationship to work, and if that means skipping the
WASHINGTON—Calling off the event that some had labeled “controversial,” President Donald Trump announced Friday that he was canceling the planned livestream execution of Sen. Jon Ossoff (D-GA). “I still believe it would have been a strong deterrent for the world to witness how America deals
NIKUMARORO, KIRIBATI—Claiming to have finally solved the longstanding mystery surrounding the missing aviator’s ultimate fate, a team of Purdue University researchers announced Friday they had found new evidence suggesting Amelia Earhart was accepted into crab society and lived the rest of her l
LONDON—Thanking HBO for the opportunity to provoke all over again, Girls creator Lena Dunham announced Friday that the series was coming back for five more controversies. “So much has changed in the world since the show ended nine years ago, and I’m excited to see what negative press we can dr
ANN ARBOR, MI — As the heated race for the open U.S. Senate seat in Michigan entered its final weeks, Democratic candidate Abdul Al-Sayed issued a fatwa against any journalists who ask questions about his support for terrorism.
ST. LOUIS—Drawing skeptical gazes from onlookers for their peculiar approach to resolving conflicts, a weird family at a local bistro reportedly settled a series of disputes calmly and respectfully Friday. “It’s crazy—they spoke one at a time, listened to what everyone else was saying, apolo
COLUMBUS, OH—As they ran freely between tables and emitted a powerful odor of sweat, grass, and damp polyester, a youth soccer team was stinking up an entire Red Robin following a morning tournament, restaurant patrons confirmed Saturday. “They’re climbing over the backs of the seats, throwin
Department of Homeland Security agents raided the home of Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN), prompting accusations of political retribution by the Trump administration ahead of the midterm elections. What do you think?
The post DHS Raids Rep. Ilhan Omar’s Home appeared first on The Onion.
WASHINGTON—Interrupting a heated discussion about national cybersecurity vulnerabilities with a series of high-pitched squeals, Health and Human Services Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. reportedly spent Thursday’s Cabinet meeting somersaulting across the conference room in excited pursuit of his
Sports
Here's what you need to know ahead of Saturday's monstrous slate.
Jaguars fans roll deep in the United Kingdom, and the fandom showed up big at London's briefly renamed ''Tealwood'' pub Thursday night.
If injuries, bye weeks or tough matchups have you seeking lineup help, Matt Bowen lists potential options.
Is it finally time to drop that one quarterback? Adam Rank says yes and offers his favorite options.
The fantasy basketball crew identifies one player they feel differently about than seemingly everyone else.
The fantasy crew gets together for it's final mock draft before the NBA season tips off.
Alabama star wide receiver Ryan Coleman-Williams underwent arthroscopic knee surgery to repair a meniscus injury, according to ESPN's Katie George.
Dream forward Allisha Gray will return from a finger injury to play in Game 1 of the WNBA Finals against the Valkyries.
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A Milwaukee Brewers fan is cashing in on a remarkable investment from 2015 for the 2026 World Series.
Which head coach would you prefer: Ohio State's Ryan Day or Indiana's Curt Cignetti? Matt Leinart gave his answer.
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Tech
At least there's still Assassin's Creed Jade to look forward to.
It might sound weird to use Android Auto outside of a vehicle, but doing so has unexpected productivity benefits.
Android phone running out of space? Here's why and what you can do to get rid of old files.
Apple called the early demand "nothing short of extraordinary."
Don't underestimate this compact pickup.
Don't panic if your Amazon Echo is flashing a yellow light. Here's what that color means, how to clear it and how to tweak your Alexa notification settings.
The premium handheld is expected to start shipping in December.
Samsung's Auto Blocker protects your Galaxy phone from security threats, but it does have drawbacks. Here's what it does and when you might want to turn it off.
When using Google Maps, it isn't rare to see blurred locations. Why does this happen? The answer is simple, and it has everything to do with security.
Amazon Alexa is a very useful gadget to have at home, but it isn't exempt from having some issues. Fortunately, troubleshooting is easy as pie.
Canada’s planned surveillance law is the latest grim step in a series of threats to encryption that are spreading around the world.
Shorter days don’t have to spell trouble for your houseplants. These are the lights we’ve used and loved in our own homes.
We tested some of the most popular automatic dry- and wet-food pet feeders to see which ones are worth the money.
These smart glasses do just about everything Meta glasses can, but they're not tied to a social media platform.
Claiming an inheritance of Bitcoin or other cryptocurrency can be like hunting for buried treasure. It doesn’t have to be.
Though plastic is usually inert, tiny pieces of it have the potential to react with one of the most pervasive molecules in the environment and in our bodies.
The DNA inside our cells isn’t just a series of instructions, but something far more dynamic. Like scientists, AI models don't yet have the data to properly decode it.
The metric might not mean much to laypeople, but leap seconds have been a source of contention in the timekeeping community for years. Now, they’re dead.
The short-lived White House press secretary was listed as an adviser to a Kristi Noem–linked company that aims to use AI for mining. Both the company and she say she never worked there.
Despite Illinois’ sanctuary laws, local police in and around Chicago helped ICE investigative agents track activists engaged in First Amendment–protected activities.
Entertainment
A couple of New York-based radio stars jumped on their hit show to blast an interesting target ... the very people signing their paychecks. Here's the deal ... The Kid Mero and Kazeem "Kaz" Famuyide -- who co-host the "Mornings with Mero" radio…
Madea may soon pop up in Puerto Rico ... because Tyler Perry bought a massive mansion on the island -- and TMZ has learned he plans to shoot some projects down there. Sources confirm to TMZ ... the movie mogul has just closed on a $30 million,…
Someone's leaking information about Jane Doe's case against the Cornell 7 ... her lawyer thinks Mark Geragos is the culprit, but Geragos came out swinging on the latest "2 Angry Men" podcast. Jane Doe's lawyer, Thomas Giuffra, filed legal docs this…
Gisele Bündchen won't be walking down any catwalks anytime soon because she is now using crutches and wearing a large medical boot to get around. TMZ obtained video and photos of the supermodel hobbling out of the Delano Hotel in Miami Beach on…
Texas Governor Greg Abbott has overcome a lot in his life -- suffering a catastrophic injury as a young adult -- so he was more than amused listening to our TMZ DC guy agonizing over whether to accept a beer because of his Gen Z stomach issues.…
Selma Blair was all smiles at a Connecticut event on Friday after her disastrous plane trip to NYC that ended with her in handcuffs for allegedly assaulting 4 people, including a cop and a nurse. The actress showed up for 90s Con at the Connecticut…
Sean "Diddy" Combs' twin daughters Jessie and D'Lila aren't letting their dad's prison transfer get in the way of a big bash ... the famous siblings were caught on camera hitting Cade Hudson's star-studded Hollywood party! TMZ obtained photos of…
Harry Styles paid tribute in a big way to Liam Payne during his Friday night gig at Madison Square Garden, belting out a special song he wrote in memory of his late former bandmate. Styles hit the stage at MSG in Midtown Manhattan for his latest…
10:24 AM PT -- Fox News tells TMZ ... “Sean Hannity decides who he interviews and what he asks his guests, period. That’s been true for three decades, through several administrations, and that authenticity is why he’s been number one for…
6:42 AM PT -- Pope Leo XIV was just spotted walking out of Gemelli Hospital in Italy, with a big security detail around him ... as a massive crowd wished him well just outside the front doors. Good news for Pope Leo XIV ... the pontiff is set to be…
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