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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Longtime reporter Bill Carter claimed that President Donald Trump was personally involved in getting Stephen Colbert's late-night show canceled by CBS network.
Former All-Star Wander Franco avoids prison after a Dominican Republic court grants a judicial pardon despite his guilty verdict for abusing a minor.
U.S. 1st Lt. Nathan Baskind, missing since the Battle of Cherbourg, was identified through DNA and laid to rest at Normandy American Cemetery.
Anne Hathaway reveals she was legally blind in one eye throughout her 30s due to a cataract and says her current vision feels like a miracle.
USC's Lincoln Riley claims he's a better coach now than at Oklahoma as the Trojans face a brutal 2026 schedule with his job potentially on the line.
Sally Field recited the First Amendment on '60 Minutes,' calling it a right she now understands "like never before" nearly 67 years after memorizing it in seventh grade.
Air Force graduate and Space Force officer Josh Yago stood at attention and saluted during the anthem before Notre Dame's NCAA lacrosse championship game against Princeton.
Anti-ICE protesters clashed with authorities outside Newark's Delaney Hall detention center as critics allege appalling conditions for detainees inside.
Cowboys QB Dak Prescott and Sarah Jane Ramos celebrate daughter Aurora's first birthday months after calling off their Lake Como, Italy, wedding.
Expert says Iran's Pezeshkian mapped a foundational wartime symbol onto current U.S. and Israel tensions, signaling Tehran won't back down easily.
Satire
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Chuck Schumer reportedly spent Memorial Day alone with his thoughts after having killed all of his backyard barbecue guests the previous year by serving them raw hamburger beef infected with E. coli.
BETHLEHEM — As Ruth was about to come pick up extra crops left for her in the fields, workers reportedly spotted Boaz carefully arranging stalks of grain on the ground to spell out "Hey Gurl."
The first Star Wars feature film in seven years should have been a grand event. But from the moment the opening text rolled, it was clear something was amiss. Yes, the story is classic pulp adventure, in the beloved style of Star Wars and Indiana Jones, but it was glaringly obvious that something wa
PEACH CREEK, KY—Taking an opportunity to firmly reiterate their stance that it weren’t their intention, America’s simple-minded bumpkins issued a joint statement Monday confirming they don’t mean no harm to nobody. “We don’t wish no ill ’pon nobody, no sir,” said bumpkin spokesperson
The post Park Gazebo Celebrates 20th Year Without A Sober Person Inside It appeared first on The Onion.
FRISCO, TX — Chaos descended on Christ Methodist of Frisco as the all-white choir attempted to sing an African spiritual.
News broke this morning that the United States and Iran have agreed to the framework of a peace deal, and our investigative team here at The Babylon Bee has managed to secure a leaked copy. Here, presented for the first time anywhere, are the terms each side has committed to:
U.S. — After yet another failed assassination attempt against President Trump yesterday, the national media has agreed to just start reporting when Trump wasn't shot at.
After months of mounting pressure, the Democratic National Committee released a draft of its 2024 election autopsy report, which fails to incorporate information from interviews with Biden or Harris and doesn’t use the words “Israel” or “Gaza.” What do you think?
The post Democrats Release
LOS ANGELES—Reminding the mother-to-be that everything she did now could have consequences for her unborn child, local obstetrician-gynecologist Dr. Carol Koenig reportedly warned Call Her Daddy host Alex Cooper on Friday to avoid public feuds during her first trimester of pregnancy. “While the
The post Cruel Stage Mom Shoves 100 Milligrams Of Adderall Down Grogu’s Throat appeared first on The Onion.
Many Americans are foregoing traditional grass lawns in favor of native plants, drought-resistent succulents, and even rocks. The Onion examines the pros and cons of alternative landscaping. PRO Fucks with stupid ants Delays climate apocalypse by 0.3 seconds Housing of pollinators provides great sou
LOS ANGELES—Touting the success of his intensive anti-aging regimen Project Blueprint, tech multimillionaire Bryan Johnson announced Monday that he had split back into a sperm and an egg. “Thanks to my team of regenerative health physicians, I have effectively reversed the aging process and have
WASHINGTON—In a dire health emergency that forced staffers to quickly mobilize to save the Cabinet member’s life, Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. was reportedly rushed to the gym Friday after suffering a sudden heart attack. “Quick, get him on an elliptical, now! He’s fading!” said
NEW YORK—Warning that curt greetings and aggressive demands could be a sign someone was a scammer, JPMorgan Chase officials reminded customers Friday to only share banking information with people who seemed nice. “Fraudsters can use your online passwords and PINs to drain your accounts before yo
NEW YORK—Calling the innovation a remarkable step forward in removing fallible judgment from the game, MLB executives announced Friday that they would be attempting to reduce human error with new electronic bat boys. “Until now, MLB has depended on the discernment of 13-year-olds to ferry gear t
Sports
Tampa Bay Rays shortstop Wander Franco was declared criminally responsible for the sexual and psychological abuse of a minor, but he will not serve a sentence for it, a judge ruled Monday in the Dominican Republic, with full sentencing slated for June 16.
Chicago's 2-1 loss to the Pirates on Monday marked its ninth straight defeat, joining the 2017 Dodgers as the only two teams in the expansion era to have multiple 10-game winning streaks and a nine-game skid in the same season.
Inter Miami CF said Monday that Lionel Messi suffered from muscle fatigue in his left hamstring during Sunday's win over the Philadelphia Union, forcing him to leave the game in the 73rd minute.
Brewers ace Jacob Misiorowski matched a career high with 12 strikeouts, carried a no-hitter into the sixth inning and hit 100 mph on more than half his pitches in Monday's win over the Cardinals.
The Lakers made their first significant move of the offseason by hiring Rohan Ramadas as an assistant GM under president and GM Rob Pelinka, sources told ESPN.
UCLA was rewarded for its dominant, wire-to-wire run through the regular season with the No. 1 seed for the NCAA tournament.
Rafael Jodar, a 19-year-old Spaniard, continued to impress in his Roland Garros debut, dropping just five games in a 6-1, 6-0, 6-4 rout of Aleksandar Kovacevic.
Chad Palumbo scored all four of his goals in the first half, Colin Burns also had a hat trick, and Princeton beat Notre Dame 16-9 on Monday for its first NCAA men's lacrosse championship since 2001.
Some World Cup roster selections can be surprising, but who are some United States players who were shockingly left out in the past?
Four conference finalists, four roster-building lessons. What could other teams learn from the Knicks, Cavs, Thunder and Spurs?
We're tracking Lionel Messi's goals and top moments for Inter Miami and the upcoming FIFA World Cup. Here's the latest.
Tests confirm Lionel Messi avoided a serious injury after exiting Inter Miami’s win early, making him available for Argentina in the 2026 World Cup.
Milwaukee’s Jacob Misiorowski threw 57 pitches of at least 100 mph — the most in a single game since pitch tracking began in 2008 — while getting 12 strikeouts to match his career high Monday against the St. Louis Cardinals
AC Milan has fired coach Massimiliano Allegri, CEO Giorgio Furlani and other senior officials after what it calls an “unequivocal failure" of a season.
One bettor bagged six figures on a six-leg MLB parlay, while another cashed in on the Knicks' miraculous ECF Game 1 rally. Patrick Everson has the scoop.
Henry Davis hit a go-ahead solo home run in the seventh inning to lead the Pittsburgh Pirates to a 2-1 victory over the Chicago Cubs.
Cesc Fabregas has heaped praise on his Como players, describing them as the best group he will ever manage, after the club secured a historic Champions League qualification.
Liverpool have made a significant move in the race to sign one of Europe's most exciting young talents.
New York Mets star Juan Soto is out of the starting lineup for the second straight day because of an illness.
Paris Saint-Germain are facing a race against time to have two of their most influential players fit for the Champions League final against Arsenal.
Tech
Sennheiser's latest Momentum headphones offer key audio and ANC improvements, including Dolby Atmos with head tracking.
The covers have come off the Ferrari Luce, the most anticipated EV ever. It completely breaks the Italian car maker's aesthetic archetype.
Our first look at a complete version of Ferrari's upcoming luxury EV that was designed by LoveFrom.
We still don't have a release date for the new game engine.
Dozens of juiced athletes competed at the Enhanced Games in Las Vegas. Most won’t admit what drugs they used.
Lots of our most-recommended headphones, power banks, and other gadgets are on sale for Memorial Day.
It’s one of the best times of the year to buy a mattress, and deals on our favorite models end tonight.
The company said its next-gen chips will be "feasible and affordable."
Single-player spin-off Squadron 42 is "in the closing stages" but doesn't have a release date either.
Memorial Day isn’t until Monday, but sales on our favorite gear are going on all weekend.
As public backlash against Big Dating mounts, a batch of new gay hookup apps offer community-powered alternatives.
Say what you will about the brand's leggings, but you'll never convince me to hate this marvel of a carryall.
If you can’t—or don’t want to—upgrade to full Windows 11, consider this lightweight version of Microsoft’s operating system that works on a wide range of computers.
As attackers ramp up their AI exploit development, the search for software vulnerabilities is changing rapidly.
NASA took advantage of the recent close approach of the Psyche probe to Mars to calibrate its observation instruments.
This week's science news.
Among the indie games we've seen worth checking out is a puzzle platformer inspired by mental health challenges and turning failures into progress.
We put the Oppo Find X9 Ultra up against the Vivo X300 Ultra to see which telephoto smartphone reigns supreme.
The Legend of Zelda is now landing in theaters on April 30.
It even has native stylus support, which Samsung dropped on the Galaxy Z Fold 7.
Entertainment
If you needed a reminder that fans are not always priority No. 1 -- turn to Russell Crowe -- cause the guy was absolutely not having it outside his Paris hotel. Check out the clip ... Russell puts autograph hunters firmly back in their lane after…
The American Music Awards are officially underway -- and Mr. Fantasy wasted absolutely no time making sure the red carpet was the place to be! Now whether this is KJ Apa or not ... who even cares -- 'cause Mr. Fantasy rolled into the Las Vegas MGM…
Wander Franco was found criminally responsible for sexually and psychologically abusing a minor ... but the MLB star will not serve jail time. A judge in the Dominican Republic ruled Monday the Tampa Bay Rays shortstop was responsible in the case…
Zayn Malik only had one direction on his mind -- straight into his waiting car ... but unfortunately for him, fans had other plans! Check out this clip of Zayn leaving his hotel in Manchester, UK -- where a swarm of fans got way too close and…
Casey Anthony is back on familiar turf ... 'cause TMZ has learned she was spotted bargain hunting in Central Florida after spending much of the last year in New Hampshire. TMZ has obtained video and pictures of Casey hitting up a TJ Maxx in Lake…
Pat McAfee’s got plenty to celebrate -- and exhale over -- after welcoming baby No. 2 with wife Samantha McAfee ... following a scary emergency C-section! In a lengthy X post Monday, Pat announced the arrival of son Midas Robert McAfee --…
Lindsie Chrisley is dealing with a new legal headache ... 'cause TMZ has learned she was arrested in Georgia over the weekend. According to jail records, obtained by TMZ, the "Chrisley Knows Best" alum was arrested Saturday night on suspicion of…
If you needed another reason to question your own life choices after seeing Bella Hadid’s Cannes red carpet slay ... her latest bikini snaps just entered the chat. Yup, Bella turned the heat all the way up in a series of yacht pics shared to her…
President Donald Trump kicked off Memorial Day with a fiery online rant targeting political enemies before heading to Arlington National Cemetery to honor America's fallen service members. Trump started the holiday Monday with a Truth Social post…
Gabriel Ganley, a Brazilian bodybuilding influencer with millions of social media followers, has died. Ganley was reportedly found dead Saturday morning inside his apartment in São Paulo, Brazil. A friend discovered Gabriel's body in the kitchen…
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