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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Vacationers are reacting as Princess Cruises hikes Plus and Premier package cruise prices by $5 per person, per day, with major changes to Wi-Fi plans starting Oct. 13.
The WNBA Finals shift Games 3 and 4 to State Farm Arena, giving the Atlanta Dream roughly 17,000 seats instead of 3,500 at Gateway Center Arena.
Jerry Jones recalls a Packers fan mooning his limo full of grandchildren after a Cowboys game at freezing Lambeau Field in a wild NFL memory.
A Lancet Commission definition of clinical obesity cuts pediatric rates sharply by requiring evidence of health complications beyond body mass index.
Former Sen. Sherrod Brown, a Democrat running for U.S. Senate in Ohio, indicated to the Columbus Dispatch that he would not support impeaching Trump
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Satire
EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND—Fanning hype for its upcoming open-world sandbox game by teasing a copious collection of tracks from the legendary singer-songwriter and film composer, Rockstar Games announced in a press release Tuesday that the Grand Theft Auto VI soundtrack would contain 10,000 songs by Rand
CHARLESTON, SC — Local grandmother Peggy Hartfield apologetically put one scammer on hold this morning so she could answer a call from a different scammer.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Following this week's DHS raid on Congresswoman Ilhan Omar's home, Democrats warned President Donald Trump that using law enforcement to target political opponents could set a dangerous precedent.
Interactions between the president and the free press have been central to the United States since the nation’s founding. The Onion takes a look back at key moments that have shaped the executive branch’s relationship with the Fourth Estate. 1803 Local busybody Arthur Swipple wanders into the Wh
ARLINGTON, VA—Saying it was disappointing to enter the smoothie shop and not be greeted by streamers or decorations, local man Ryan Hunter confirmed Tuesday that workers at Sweetgrass Juicery were not as excited for his birthday as the marketing email had suggested they were. “Yesterday I got th
The post Late Uncle Remembered As Man Who Had Can Crusher In Garage appeared first on The Onion.
COLLEGE STATION, TX — Off work for Columbus Day, local man Clay Taylor headed out to the golf course for a relaxing afternoon cursing himself and the day he was brought into this world.
Federal agents raided Congresswoman Ilhan Omar's home on Monday as part of an investigation into potential immigration fraud. According to highly placed government sources, what agents recovered at the scene will shock you to your very core.
AUSTIN, TX — Despite overwhelming evidence, a local fringe conspiracy theorist continued to insist that U.S. Senate hopeful James Talarico wasn't insane.
U.S. — Theologians from across the country signed onto a joint paper arguing that the existence of the Minas Tirith LEGO set proves beyond all doubt that God loves us and wants to give us good things.
NEW YORK, NY — The mayor's office announced on Monday that any ICE agents who cross the border into the city without permission would be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.
BOUNTIFUL, UT — A local runner made history Tuesday by completing a 26.2-mile marathon without ever posting a single update about his training schedule to Facebook.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — As public debate continued over the scheduled live-streaming of terrorist Nidal Hasan's death by firing squad, President Donald Trump told liberals who are uncomfortable with public executions to just imagine that it's a healthcare CEO.
In the Russian city of Irkutsk, the death of a plague researcher from a mysterious illness has stoked fears of an outbreak. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the emerging situation. Q: What is the Irkutsk Anti-Plague Research Institute? A: An on-the-nose alibi. Q: Should I be worrie
BISMARCK, ND—Admitting that it had let the other 49 states do “pretty much all of the heavy lifting,” North Dakota issued a formal apology Tuesday for contributing nothing to the nation’s greatness. “Look, we acknowledge that we don’t exactly bring much to the table besides being a cold
NEW YORK—Condemning the semiaquatic seabirds’ heretical acts as an affront to the principles the organization was founded to sustain, Audubon Society officials released a statement Monday formally excommunicating penguins. “These flightless beasts have committed acts of unforgivable schism aga
The post Marathoner Already Pissing Self Half-Mile In appeared first on The Onion.
In what would be the nation’s first public execution in 90 years, Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth announced the Pentagon would livestream Fort Hood shooter Nidal Hasan’s death by firing squad. What do you think?
The post Pentagon To Livestream Firing Squad Execution appeared first on The Onion.
WASHINGTON—Calling the attention the incident was receiving yet another example of liberal media bias, the White House downplayed on Friday the fact that a hyena was currently biting down on the ass of President Donald Trump. “No one should be surprised that all the scrutiny from the mainstream
Sports
After a three-week intermission, the Premier League returned with a bang last weekend. Will Man City eventually crumble under the pressure? Is this the real Man United? Let's overreact!
Man United fans go from thinking the team will win the Premier League to thinking the sky is falling. The truth is in the middle and it's unlikely to shift.
From elite scorers to exciting rookies to legit drama, here's what we love about all 32.
With every NHL team in action, our experts give you betting tips and picks for Frozen Frenzy 2026.
The Brewers take a two-game lead in the NLCS, while the Guardians stun the Rays at home. Relive all of Monday's action.
Hurricanes captain Jordan Staal, the playoff MVP in their Stanley Cup championship run last season, will miss one to two months with a torn calf muscle.
Eric Karabell lists who he thinks are the top available players worth adding for the week ahead.
The WNBA announced Tuesday that Games 3 and 4 of the Finals between the Golden State Valkyries and Atlanta Dream will be played at State Farm Arena in Atlanta.
The NFL has reversed course and now says that former Ole Miss DL Zxavian Harris is free to sign with teams this season after a failed attempt to return to college football at LSU.
The Rams are releasing kicker Harrison Mevis and signing Blake Grupe off the Jets' practice squad, sources told NFL Network's Ian Rapoport and Mike Garafolo on Tuesday.
Check out the latest odds for the 2026 NFL Defensive Player of the Year award and see how far Will Anderson sits ahead of the field.
The Rams have finally been knocked off their perch, while the Bills and Ravens have surpassed the Chiefs. See the latest.
Ranking the top-20 club teams in world soccer seven weeks into new the season.
Find out why Will Hill is backing the Badgers to upset the Bruins and why he likes the Broncos to protect home turf.
Key plays by Mike Evans and Jayden Daniels defined Week 5. Here's what you need to know from them.
The Rams are reportedly cutting ties with kicker Harrison Mevis, who missed two field goals in the team's Week 5 loss to the Bills.
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Tech
Barbarian, The Fly, and Altered States are among the films deserving of your eyeballs this month.
NVIDIA's upscaling software is truly powerful when used in the right situations.
Listening to Apple's new audio features with Siri as our binge-watching companion.
It stars two new FBI agents that aren't named Mulder and Scully.
Within reason, of course.
Going beyond the number of cameras and megapixels.
Normal-looking glasses with solid audio and way better battery life is a win for everyone.
That would be a much smaller port time than GTA 5.
The company is revamping the Play Store for the AI era with changes to publishing, recommendations and more.
Get those VPNs ready.
Your phone would lose a long list of features and basic functions if it didn't have proximity sensors.
The team behind director Takashi Yamazaki’s new film created their kaiju roars by setting up speakers on top of an outdoor dam. The people walking by weren’t prepared for what they heard.
With customizable “faces,” this 7-inch smart display is a unique hybrid between an iPhone and an Apple Watch.
I got an early glimpse of Apple’s biggest push into the smart home in years.
Score a great gift for everyone on your list without breaking the bank. Every one of these gifts comes WIRED-recommended.
Give the techie in your life access to the inner workings of the companies and characters shaping Big Tech.
In a world of AI Overviews, Wikipedia usage declines. But the real loss may be far more existential than website traffic.
Elon Musk’s father, Errol Musk, agreed to be interviewed immediately.
Backed by Silicon Valley titans, Leading the Future has raised huge sums to promote pro-AI candidates on both side of the aisle.
I’ve tested every single Kindle, from Paperwhite and Colorsoft to the new aluminum models. Here’s how Amazon’s ebook readers stack up.
Entertainment
RJ Mitte struggled with getting cast as a disabled actor in Hollywood ... at least according to years of text messages he exchanged with a friend. According to messages obtained by Daily Mail, RJ often griped to his friend about the challenges he…
The Atlanta teacher who plunged to his death from a roller coaster at Six Flags Over Georgia made an eerily ironic Facebook post just days before the tragedy ... and it was all about coasters. Hassan Jihad Ibn Kariem showed off a homemade drink…
Brad Pitt and Ines de Ramon are turning the streets of Paris into their own personal runway ... stepping out in some seriously wild outfits for a date night in the City of Love. The couple was spotted leaving Le Grand Rex after catching a James…
'Pioneer Woman' Ree Drummond's foster son, Jamar Goff, is facing more legal trouble after his recent drug arrest ... TMZ has learned. According to court docs, obtained by TMZ, Alabama prosecutors asked to revoke 23-year-old Jamar's bond from a 2025…
Josh Brolin had a wild childhood -- literally -- because he grew up with wild animals roaming in and out of his home. The actor told Theo Von that he grew up surrounded by wolves and mountain lions ... explaining that his brother had to get 60…
Tuesday on the trails never looked better ... can you guess which Hollywood hottie is soaking up the gorgeous fall weather on a hike?!? Her iconic curves have landed her in publications like Maxim, GQ, and Glamour, and she's acted in some…
We want you to be a part of TMZ, so every weekday, between 10:30 AM and 12:00 PM PT, we take you inside our newsroom via live stream. You never know what you're gonna get ... a big story that breaks, an argument erupts in the room, or someone's…
Duane "Keffe D" Davis -- the man recently convicted of orchestrating Tupac's 1996 murder -- is about to be sentenced ... and TMZ is streaming live. The judge sentenced Keffe D to 40 years to life during his appearance in a Las Vegas courthouse…
Joe Manganiello says he almost took a friend up on an offer to abduct and beat the you-know-what out of Sofía Vergara's ex, Nick Loeb ... but he ultimately thought better of it. The actor shared his disgust for Sofía's former fiancé in his new…
Cornell University is putting the brakes on fraternity parties for the rest of the school year ... and its president is admitting there's a serious drug and alcohol problem on campus. In a letter to the campus community Tuesday, Cornell President…
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