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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Tiger Woods seeks treatment following his arrest on suspicion of driving under the influence, and a singer cheers a controversial Apache flyover in this week's News Quiz.
U.S. Vice President JD Vance is scheduled to head to Hungary and meet with Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orbán as the foreign leader runs for re-election.
President Trump's firing of Attorney General Pam Bondi expands the political drama surrounding Epstein files and the president's enemies list.
Pima County Sheriff Chris Nanos faces perjury allegations over his early career history as his department investigates Nancy Guthrie's disappearance.
Education advocates are pushing for stronger national civics standards as data shows most U.S. students lack a basic knowledge of American government.
Chef José Andrés joined protesters outside the Supreme Court as Trump attended arguments on birthright citizenship in a historic appearance at the High Court Wednesday.
Archaeologists uncovered a four-pound bronze cannonball at the Alamo, likely fired during the 1836 battle, just one day before its 190th anniversary.
Princess Beatrice and Princess Eugenie to miss Easter services due to royal family blowback after former Prince Andrew's arrest and ties to Jeffrey Epstein.
Representative Seth Moulton argues Trump's Wednesday address offered vague promises on Iran with no clear plan to end the war or reopen the Strait.
Democrats face a defining intra-party battle between progressives and moderates that could determine their 2028 presidential chances and viability.
Satire
It's been all the buzz in the media this week, but only The Babylon Bee has the actual details about the features of President Trump's new White House ballroom.
CAPE CANAVERAL, FL — Russell Patrick has been doing the same job for NASA for over 50 years, though he's gotten little recognition despite the essential service he provides.
ROANOKE, VA — In a historic first that is shaking up the entire podcasting universe, one podcaster went on another podcaster's podcast.
President Donald Trump signed an executive order aiming to create federal lists of citizens which the U.S. Postal Service would use to ensure mail ballots are sent to only those people, with the effort to exert control over American elections sure to be quickly challenged in court. What do you think
LOS ANGELES—Admitting that the team’s ballooning salary expenditures had rapidly gotten away from him, panicked Los Angeles Dodgers owner Mark Walter told reporters Thursday that he had absolutely no idea how he was going to come up with the funds needed to cover this year’s $414 million payro
WASHINGTON—In an effort to clamp down on what it claimed was fraudulent use of federal food benefits, the U.S. Department of Agriculture announced Thursday that applicants to the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program would now need to demonstrate that they spend at least 80 hours per month in
WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump announced on Thursday that after careful evaluation, he had determined that Attorney General Pam Bondi was "not quite hot enough" to be this incompetent at her job.
CAPE CANAVERAL, FL — NASA issued a statement on Thursday confirming that Elon Musk had launched an emergency rescue plumber into space late Wednesday night to repair the broken toilet on the Artemis II spacecraft.
ATLANTA—Forced to call off the approximately $4 billion journey around the moon due to unforeseen delays experienced by its four-member crew, NASA confirmed Thursday that the Artemis II mission failed Thursday after astronauts missed their connecting flight in Atlanta. “We thought we had enough
JERUSALEM — Witnesses revealed that total idiot Judas Iscariot dipped his bread in the bowl with Jesus mere seconds after the Lord announced that the one who dipped his bread in the bowl would betray Him.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — The United States Supreme Court issued an official statement on Thursday begging the state of Colorado to please just be normal for once.
The Super Mario Galaxy Movie is now in theaters. The Onion shares everything you need to know about the film. Q: Does Mario say his famous catchphrase? A: Yes, many times throughout the movie Mario exclaims, “Any dinosaur who likes Mama’s Bolognese sauce is okay by me!” Q: What is the film a
AUSTIN, TX—Reporting that he plans to shower at the gym due to the bathtub being left “absolutely disgusting,” local man Michael DiCanio expressed annoyance Thursday that his wife had inconsiderately left the apartment’s only bathroom a total mess after giving birth to their first child. “
The post Jake Paul Hoping To Gain Respect Of Boxing Community With Fight Against World’s Tallest Man appeared first on The Onion.
TOLEDO, OH—Visibly distraught as he learned of the widespread betrayal, local mail carrier Ned Mungo expressed dismay Thursday upon realizing that the residents on his route have been receiving electronic mail for years without his knowing. “Day in and day out, I’ve been coming to these doorst
LOS ANGELES—Admitting that there were some significant upsides to the deal despite the concerns it had raised, analysts at the National Research Group reported Thursday that the upcoming Paramount-Warner Bros. merger offered consumers the best shot at seeing a Sex And The City reboot starring th
The post Sam Altman: ‘If I Don’t End The World, Someone Far More Dangerous Will’ appeared first on The Onion.
Sports
Manchester United, Chelsea, Arsenal, and Liverpool are interested in Aston Villa midfielder Morgan Rogers. Transfer Talk has the latest.
The Wildcats are back in the national semifinals for the first time in 25 years -- but are focused on the moment.
We run through every team's keys to advancing to the championship game -- and their potential fatal flaws.
FOX Sports' Michael Cohen offers up four takeaways from Day 2 of the 2026 College Basketball Crown.
The 27-year-old goalie has had a record-breaking debut season for the Hurricanes, and his brother remains in his mindset.
Tristan H. Cockcroft takes a look at five pitchers who are likely to be on many a fantasy championship roster.
Eric Karabell looks into the crystal ball to tell fantasy baseball managers what might come to pass in the not-too-distant future.
Wondering who to watch during this weekend's Final Four? We break down the best on the court.
Here's how UConn, UCLA, South Carolina and Texas can win the NCAA title, and what might derail them.
The World Cup is defined by memorable moments. Counting down to the top 100 of all-time.
Catcher Carter Jensen was removed from the Royals' starting lineup for Thursday's game against the Twins after he overslept.
The Buffalo Bills quarterback and the "Sinners" actress did not share the date of birth or the name of their daughter.
Coming out of a brutal March window, who is most likely to make the USA's World Cup roster?
Let's dive into the World Cup field by placing all the teams into distinct tiers and who to keep an eye on.
Here is Iraq's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Here is Türkiye's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Here is Sweden's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Here is Czechia's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Bosnia and Herzegovina's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Here is New Zealand's World Cup group stage opponents, which stadiums they will play at, and the times for the games.
Tech
Samsung leans into its artistic side with its newest TVs.
The Quizlet flashcards, which WIRED found through basic Google searches, seem to include sensitive information about gate security at Customs and Border Protection locations.
Ahead of its premiere, Dave Filoni has revealed that the Star Wars animated series Maul: Shadow Lord will return for a second season. The Lucasfilm co-president revealed that season 2 is already in the works, telling Esquire that "at the end of the day, people like that character."
Filoni didn't r
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For April Fools' Day, the developer of Look Outside released an update that added a new option to your interactions with NPCs: kissing. Instead of just fighting or talking to enemies and surviving neighbors in the cursed apartment building, you could give 'em a smooch. Their dialogue and sprites wer
Sony Interactive Entertainment, owner of the PlayStation brand, has acquired Cinemersive Labs, a UK startup developing tools to convert 2D photos and videos into 3D volumes. The startup team will join Sony's Visual Computing Group, a research engineering team focused on graphical technology, includi
Everyone's four favorite anthropomorphic turtles are returning to the world of video games. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Empire City will be released on April 30 for the Meta Quest, Steam VR and Pico. It is made by VR game company Cortopia Studios and will retail for $25. Empire City is a first-pe
In a surprise release, OpenAI has made ChatGPT's Voice mode available through Apple CarPlay. If you're running the latest version of both iOS and the ChatGPT app, and own a CarPlay-compatible vehicle, you can check out the experience. To get started, download all the necessary software, connect your
The US Commodity Futures Trading Commission is suing Illinois, Arizona and Connecticut for attempting to outlaw or regulate prediction markets like Kalshi and Polymarket. The CFTC believes it has sole jurisdiction to regulate these platforms, and that states attempting to classify them as illegal ga
Coachella officially kicks off next Friday, April 10. But for anyone who doesn’t want to fly out to the desert or fork over upwards of $650 for a ticket, YouTube is going to livestream the concert for free so you can enjoy it on your own terms. Here’s a quick overview of all the programming that
Publisher and game management platform indie.io just announced the pending launch of something called Indie Pass. This is a subscription service, so it's sort of like Game Pass but for indie titles.
It launches on April 13 and will offer over 70 games on that date, with more coming down the line. No
Russia has closed a loophole that allowed its citizens to pay for Apple digital services. "As of April 1, 2026, payment processing is no longer available for purchases made on the App Store or other Apple Media Services in Russia," the company wrote in a support document (via 9to5Mac).The change aff
When Google released Gemini 3 Pro at the end of last year, it was a significant step forward for the company's proprietary large language models. Now, the company is bringing some of the same technology and research that made those models possible to the open source community with the release of its
Entertainment
"Bob's Burgers" voice actor Eugene Mirman was "incoherent" when he was pulled from his fiery car crash in New Hampshire this week. TMZ obtained dispatch audio from Tuesday's terrifying crash, and you can hear responders describing him after he…
"Below Deck" star Trevor Walker begged the police not to take him into custody before his DUI arrest, TMZ has learned. According to a police report obtained by TMZ, Trevor was pulled over for driving 75 MPH in a 45 MPH zone. The officer…
Joseph and Kendra Duggar's March arrests took quite the toll on Kendra ... who told her husband over the phone she could barely eat or even walk from the stress of the situation. Kendra confessed her struggles to Joseph while he remained…
Hayley Kiyoko is halfway through her 30s ... and she's still as fine as ever. The "Girls Like Girls" singer is celebrating another trip around the sun today ... and a quick look at her hot shots proves she's hotter than the sun. Hayley is keen…
Former Arizona legend Mike Bibby is calling it as he sees it: the Wildcats’ Final Four showdown with Michigan isn’t just another game … it’s the game. Bibby -- who cut down the nets as a player when U of A won it all in 1997 -- didn’t…
TMZ may collect a share of sales or other compensation from links on this page. Sometimes, a great outfit starts with what's underneath. Whether you want to look snatched in a figure-hugging dress or just want an extra boost of confidence on your…
Before this cute girl swingin' on the playground turned into an actress, she was just attending the Fine Arts program in high school and gearing up for her admission at NYU ... Some of her movie credits include "The Perfect Date" and "The New…
Britney Spears' son Sean Preston Federline is swapping out his father's last name for his famous mother's ... at least on social media. Sean Preston is now going by Sean P Spears on Instagram ... adding Spears to his handle and shortening his…
A completely naked man got into a street fight outside a Kanye West concert ... and it's all on video. TMZ obtained footage showing a guy throwing hands in his birthday suit Wednesday night at an intersection outside SoFi Stadium in Inglewood, CA,…
Todd Bridges and his wife are officially going different ways because he just filed for divorce ... TMZ has confirmed. The "Diff'rent Strokes" star beelined it to court Tuesday in Arizona and filed to divorce his wife, Bettijo B. Hirschi,…
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