US News
• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow • Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson • Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich had his first byline since his release from Russia, writing about the shadowy Kremlin agency behind his arrest.
Black Friday is back through December 16! Get deals on technology, beauty products, shoes and more.
A DEI administrator at the University of Michigan was reportedly fired by the school after she was accused of making multiple antisemitic remarks.
Riley Gaines' latest online spat with a left-leaning figure came against journalist Jemele Hill regarding Caitlin Clark's recent 'White privilege' comments.
Jake Paul's Most Valuable Promotions announced it has added Olympian and amateur world champion Tammara "Tamm" Thibeault to its roster.
"Yellowstone" star Luke Grimes is not "pointing any fingers," but this season, without Kevin Costner, was the easiest for him to film. The series finale airs on Dec. 15.
The Harris County District Attorney is seeking the death penalty for the two illegal migrants from Venezuela who are accused of killing 12-year-old Jocelyn Nungaray in Texas in June.
Christian Slater admitted that he was a “frighteningly different person" in the 1990s. The "Dexter: Original Sin" star battled addiction struggles and legal issues before becoming sober.
Body language expert Susan Constantine analyzed videos and photos of Luigi Mangione, who is accused of shooting UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson dead on Dec. 4.
Get all the stories you need-to-know from the most powerful name in news delivered first thing every morning to your inbox.

Satire
BENTON HARBOR, MI—Confirming that the device would give home cooks the speed, efficiency, and power of over 200 professional chefs, appliance brand KitchenAid announced Wednesday that it had begun selling a new military-grade culinary mech suit. “Whether you are attempting to make your world-fa
By Commander Byxxurian Greetings, earthlings. I am Commander Byxxurian from Nebula Vriphlaxor-9. I come bearing a message of utmost importance from the galactic consortium. Its intended recipient is one who lives among you, and if it is not delivered quickly, then I fear all hope will be lost. Pleas
HOUSTON—In a devastating accident that left the entire downtown area in smoldering ruins, officials confirmed Tuesday that the Houston skyline had been knocked over by a large, playful sheepdog named Gus. According to eyewitnesses, the 3-year-old Old English sheepdog tore through the business dis
MYSTIC, CT — Local churchgoer Clive Richmond, known for his habit of wearing a blue jacket, tall feathered hat, and yellow boots, must now switch to wearing just a boring old dress shirt and slacks to services after his "total killjoy of a wife" told him to stop dressing like Tom Bombadil every Su
Everyone loves a good Christmas movie, as long as you're not a sociopath with an ice-cold heart, that is. But did you know there are far more Christmas movies than you realized? Some of your favorite movies are actually, in fact, Christmas movies.
WASHINGTON, D.C. — Federal agent Ray Epps will step down from his role as head of PSYOPS at the end of the Biden administration, the agency said Thursday, ending a distinguished career of covertly manipulating the American people.
LANCASTER, PA—Leaping up from his rocking chair as the realization filled him with utter panic, forgetful Amish guy Amos Yoder suddenly and loudly shrieked ‘The harvest!’ on Thursday, according to Pennsylvania Dutch sources. “The crops, the crops! Amos, you old Wutz, you’ve gone and messed
WASHINGTON—In an evident attempt to walk back previous inflammatory statements, prospective Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth clarified Thursday that although he now believes women should be allowed in combat roles, he still sees that as a huge turnoff. “While I want to state that I have nothing
U.S. — Despite currently being in custody and charged with the murder of a health insurance company CEO, alleged assassin Luigi Mangione has now taken the lead in 2028 Democratic primary polls.
Whether you’re spending time with cherished family members or new friends, skipping small talk and diving into deeper topics can help strengthen your relationships. The Onion shares tips for having more meaningful conversations. Bang a gavel every time someone says something trivial. Put your phon
ANN ARBOR, MI — After weeks of intense research and deliberation among colleagues, local husband Felix Mayweather bought the wrong Christmas gift for his wife.
VALHALLA, NY — In what the media hailed as the most prestigious award announcement of the season, Vice President Kamala Harris was named "Person of the Year" by Wine Enthusiast magazine.
The post Wrongly Convicted Death Row Inmate Exonerated Mere Hours After Execution appeared first on The Onion.
U.S. — Liberals are putting extra effort into their secular holiday plans this year, taking the time to stop and wish people "Happy Holidays" one last time before Trump makes it an act punishable by death.
MARTHA'S VINEYARD, MA — In the wake of the assassination of the UnitedHealth CEO, former President Barack Obama stepped forward to calm tensions by reminding Americans not to be too hasty to find and assassinate everyone responsible for the healthcare crisis.
NEW YORK—Confessing that celebrations had unfortunately gotten a little out of hand in recent years, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell told reporters this week that he was planning a small, intimate Super Bowl with just friends and family. “This year, instead of a big blowout with over 83,000 fans,
WASHINGTON—Mounting a public campaign in an effort to determine the origin of the unrecognized foliage specimen, Secretary of the Interior Deb Haaland asked the nation for help Friday in identifying a leaf that she confirmed was “from a tree or something” but remained a mystery otherwise. “
CLEVELAND—In an advertising choice that stunned observers with its sheer audacity, ballsy retirement home Sunrise Heights has an interracial couple right on the front of its brochure, sources confirmed Thursday. “Holy shit, they really just went for it, huh?” said local man Derek Allsworth, on

Sports
The Rams' playoff chances now sit as 52% and 49% to win the division entering the weekend.
The United States women's national team ended the year as No. 1 in the FIFA rankings.
U.S. international Alejandro Zendejas proved to be the hero for Club América after scoring the game-winning goas to give his team a 2-1 victory over Monterrey in the Liga MX first leg final.
Tottenham Hotspur head coach Ange Postecoglou has said that he has no interest in how Timo Werner received his "assessment" against Rangers.
Lionel Messi has acknowledged that Barcelona teenage sensation Lamine Yamal reminds him of himself when he was young.
Liverpool head coach Arne Slot has said striker Darwin Núñez wants to score goals "almost too much" amid ongoing criticism of his performances for the club.
Manchester City boss Pep Guardiola has said he is willing to dip into the market in the January transfer window to bolster his squad if their slump continues.
Ruben Amorim has said Manchester City are in a "better place" than Manchester United ahead of the derby on Sunday despite Pep Guardiola's team losing seven of their last 10 games.
What did Max Fried & Co. teach us this week? Starting pitching, famously out of vogue in the modern game, is more expensive than ever.
The Buffalo and Detroit offenses both have the potential to go off. So which squad will prevail on Sunday? Sammy P breaks it down from a betting perspective.
Minnesota remains the best of the best in the eyes of our voters. And with the giving season upon us, here's what each team needs.
The 2024 NFL Coach of the Year list of candidates is STACKED! We sort through the good and bad of nine deserving coaches.
Veteran LB De'Vondre Campbell refused to enter the game in the second half of the 49ers' 12-6 loss to the Rams on Thursday.
Bronny James set a new career-high for points while on assignment with the South Bay Lakers on Thursday.
Curtis Jones scored 23 points, Joshua Jefferson added 19 points and 10 rebounds and No. 3 Iowa State overcame a 13-point deficit to beat Iowa 89-80 on Thursday night.
Juan Soto explained what motivated his decision to leave the Yankees for the Mets in his introductory press conference on Thursday.
Patriots players expressed shock that their former coach Bill Belichick was heading to college, and they wondered if his hard-driving style would resonate with younger athletes.
Check out the greatest moments and plays in this matchup between the Iowa State Cyclones and the Iowa Hawkeyes.
Hannah Hidalgo had 29 points, 10 rebounds and eight assists, and No. 8 Notre Dame handed second-ranked UConn its first loss with a 79-68 victory Thursday night.
Curtis Jones drained a deep 3-pointer to extend the Iowa State Cyclones' lead over the Iowa Hawkeyes.

Tech
Formovie’s Theater took the projector world by storm when it first arrived, offering a triple laser, 150-inch ultra short throw (UST) image and Dolby Vision for $3,000. That was a relatively unheard of price for such a feature set, especially from a brand that hardly anyone knew about. That model
Capcom has announced Onimusha: Way of the Sword, the first new Onimusha game since the original 2001 PS2 version was remastered in 2019. Revealed at The Game Awards 2024, it reveals a modern take on the classic dark action game, minus the fixed perspectives as before.  The trailer for the single pl
Unlike Waymo's hybrid system of AI training with hand-coded instructions, Wayve's AI handles the entire self-driving process, learning unsupervised to cope with the unpredictable and drive more like we do.
It’s been a few years since Samsung took a crack at making a premium Chromebook. In 2020, the company released the first Galaxy Chromebook, a $999 laptop with a gorgeous 4K OLED screen that barely lasted five hours away from a charger. The company fixed some issues with its 2021 model, which had a
AI creates what it’s told to, from plucking fanciful evidence from thin air, to arbitrarily removing people’s rights, to sowing doubt over public misdeeds.
One of the highlights from The Game Awards last night was the moment Breaking Bad star Aaron Paul and voice actor Laura Bailey took the stage to reveal Dispatch. Set to arrive in 2025, the narrative game is from AdHoc Studio, founded by former Telltale Games developers, and features a stacked cast i
By setting limits on app use, limiting your notifications, and keeping tabs on your screen time, you can unleash your mind from the tyranny of the scroll.
New iPhone 16 owners can pick up an Apple charger for cheap right now. The latest, more powerful MagSafe charger has dropped to as low as $30. You'll get that price on the 1m (3.3 ft) model, but the better discount is on the 2m (6.6 ft) model, which is 29 percent off and on sale for $35. That’s a
With over 60 million PS5s sold, Sony is so far dominating this generation of game consoles. Four years since the PlayStation 5 debuted, the company has rounded out its gaming lineup with the refined PS5 Slim (both with and without a disc drive) and the more powerful (and expensive) PS5 Pro. At poss
These are the best wraps, carriers, and slings to help you bring your infant wherever you go.
As has been rumored for a while (and in line with Sony's promise to share exclusive titles in a timely fashion) PlayStation's The Last of Us Part 2 Remastered is coming to PC on April 3, 2025, developer Naughty Dog announced. "We're all thrilled to bring The Last of Us Part 2 to the PC audience, inc
At long last, iPhone users have access to Apple's AI image generation tools, Genmoji (for customized emoji) and Image Playground. But based on our testing, these Apple Intelligence features aren't fully baked. In this episode, Devindra and Cherlynn discuss why these AI tools aren't very useful and d
The Game Awards delivered. While the games I thought deserved to win did so (Astro Bot! Balatro! Metaphor!), we got some wildcard trailers, like an entirely new game from Last of Us studio Naughty Dog. Intergalactic: The Heretic Prophet takes place thousands of years in the future, and it stars bou
Online, lots of people have ideas about what could happen if the murder suspect’s life were given the Hollywood treatment. Let’s make sure that idea gets a red light.
The curated feed, now run by a team of six moderators, is the meeting ground for hundreds of thousands of Black users on Bluesky. Is it ready to meet the moment?
Frank McCourt says his bid for TikTok is part of a broader mission to move millions of people to healthier online platforms. “I compare this to large-scale, human physical migration.”
The best gift idea for your dad is a nicer version of something he already owns. The second best is one of these things.
The white supremacist Robert Rundo faces years in prison. But the “Active Club” network he helped create has proliferated in countries around the world, from Eastern Europe to South America.
Get 10% off top tech products with a Logitech coupon code, only available at WIRED.
The Game Awards are over — congratulations to Team Asobi for Astro Bot taking home the Game of the Year award. As always, the long, long stream was a hybrid award ceremony, advertising reel and game announcement marathon.  There were countless announcements interspersed throughout the awards, inc

Entertainment
Jeff Bezos may have wanted his newspaper to stay out of politics when he killed a Washington Post endorsement for Kamala Harris ... but he sure opened his wallet fast for President-elect Donald Trump. Here's the deal ... Amazon and Meta have each…
Beyoncé's really earning the name "Cowboy Carter" ... riding away from the Billboard Music Awards with her first country music win after being snubbed by the Country Music Association. The singer-songwriter took home the trophy for top country…
Kirk Herbstreit found himself in the crosshairs of annoyed social media users on Thursday night ... after he incorrectly identified injured 49ers star Trent Williams live on-air. The embarrassing gaffe happened in the first quarter of San…
Kim Kardashian didn't let her broken foot get in the way of a good time inside her SKIMS event Thursday night. Check out new video, obtained by TMZ, which shows the reality star/entrepreneur using a mobility scooter to roll around inside the…
The Yankees will head into next season without Juan Soto, but fear not, New York fans ... Johnny Damon tells TMZ Sports they might just be better without the star slugger!! We caught up with the 51-year-old former Pinstripes outfielder on Thursday…
Beware ... it's Friday the 13th so to cast some GOOD luck on your freaky Friday, we're shouting out the iconic cast from the horror/crime film franchise, "Friday the 13th," dating back to 1980! To kick things off, American investment banker and…
TMZ may collect a share of sales or other compensation from links on this page. If you're still shopping for friends and family this holiday season, consider giving the gift of a little bling! Jewelry is a timeless way to show someone how much they…
Kim Kardashian is doing what she can to stay moving amid her recent foot injury ... even enlisting the help of a mobility scooter to get around. Check it out ... the reality TV star had a less-than-glamorous arrival as she swung by the flagship…
Dr. Terry Dubrow is shutting down Brandi Glanville’s claims that a parasite is messing with her face ... telling us it’s definitely something that’s made its way into her bloodstream through an injection. We caught up with the "Botched" star…
Luigi Mangione, the suspected killer in the murder of UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson, was never a client of his alleged victim's company ... this according to the NYPD. NYPD Chief of Detectives Joseph Kenny spoke with NBC New York Thursday,…

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