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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Alabama called races within an hour of polls closing while D.C. officials didn't begin counting ballots until nearly three hours later Tuesday.
During the G7 Summit, President Trump slammed Joe Biden's Afghanistan withdrawal in 2021 and said he may regain the roughly $7 billion in equipment that was left behind.
Hasan Piker said in a new interview that Israel in its current formation does not have a right to exist, comparing it to Nazi Germany and apartheid South Africa.
ICE officer Gregory Simmonds jumped into a Florida pool fully clothed to rescue a drowning 6-year-old, performing CPR until the child revived.
Israel's government brands Route 60 as the Biblical Highway, aiming to strengthen heritage tourism and the nation's identity as the land of the Bible.
Eight different franchises have won the past eight NBA titles, sparking a heated debate over whether parity helps or hurts the league's popularity.
Officials identified eight victims of the B-52 Stratofortress crash at Edwards Air Force Base, including military personnel, civilians and contractors.
Elon Musk amplified a citizen-funded report accusing the British state of failing to protect children from organized grooming gang exploitation across England.
The WNBA announced it will expand its regular-season schedule from 44 games to 50 beginning in 2027, marking the longest season in league history.
OMB releases $351.6 million to the Secret Service for White House security measures as Trump continues pushing for a ballroom where the East Wing stood.
Satire
NEW YORK, NY — MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred, reportedly infuriated by news of ball players defiling their pride hats with Bible verses, has ordered anyone who refuses to bow to the pride flag be cast into the fiery furnace.
WASHINGTON—Patting themselves on the back for seeing a film that was neither a sequel nor a prequel, the U.S. populace announced Wednesday that they were proud of themselves for watching and enjoying an original movie. “Learning the names of characters I’d never heard of before wasn’t easy,
IRAN — In a sign of total and absolute victory, President Trump announced that he had secured the reopening of the vital Strait of Hormuz, which was open before the war that Trump started in Iran.
CHICAGO, IL — In a bid to capture vintage nostalgia, McDonald's has announced the return of its true, original-recipe apple pies. The company confirmed the legendary dessert will once again feature the secret ingredient from its initial nineteenth-century inspiration: cocaine.
WORLD — Citizens across the globe breathed a collective sigh of relief after learning that the government of Iran has promised to be good from here on out as part of the peace deal negotiated by President Donald Trump.
Vacation Bible School season is upon us once again, and you may have noticed that every denomination has its own special twist on how to engage elementary-age kiddos. The Babylon Bee has surveyed the country, and here are the most popular VBS themes for each denomination:
EVIAN, FRANCE — Years after wandering away from a G7 summit, a confused former President Joe Biden was seen wandering back into the G7 meeting in France this week. A gathering of top world leaders was in the middle of a high-stakes debate on global trade when the doors swung open to the conference
Elon Musk became the world’s first trillionaire after his company SpaceX went public, with his personal net worth now eclipsing the entire GDP of countries like Taiwan, Ireland, and Sweden. What do you think?
The post Elon Musk Becomes World’s First Trillionaire appeared first on The Onion.
DALLAS—In a bold risk that strayed from her usual habits, local woman Emily Lentz reportedly dove headfirst into a thrilling adventure Wednesday by blindly purchasing a different apple variety. “What crazy times might this Cosmic Crisp have in store for me? I choose to accept its enigmatic offer
NEW YORK—At last providing a definitive answer to fans’ endless speculation, Sopranos creator and executive producer David Chase confirmed Tuesday that Tony Soprano died at the end of every episode in the series. “People have been asking me for a clear answer for a long, long time, so here it
It’ll take a lot more than the death of Fran Stephens, 50, to trigger a recall of ground beef.
The post Fran Stephens appeared first on The Onion.
The post Area Child’s Drawing Of Family Raises Troubling Questions About Size Of Dad appeared first on The Onion.
When I first booted up The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, I thought I was gonna be in for a magical experience. The opening title card is fantastical and mysterious, and the music is pretty good. I couldn't find an option to turn the graphics to 4K resolution, but I set that aside and got started
The post Mikal Bridges Wakes Up From 4-Day Bender Next To Dead Jimmy Fallon appeared first on The Onion.
RAMSES — Archaeologists excavating at ancient Egyptian historical sites discovered evidence of another biblical plague, this one believed to have consisted of a horde of cyclists blocking Pharaoh's morning commute.
NEW YORK, NY — According to sources, Vice President JD Vance stumbled upon an incredible discovery on Tuesday when he made contact with a tribe of illiterate, feral women.
The UFC Freedom 250 event to celebrate President Donald Trump's birthday (and also for America's 250th birthday, kind of) was a massive success. That means one thing — more bloody, violent fights on the White House lawn. Through highly placed White House insiders, The Babylon Bee has obtained an e
New Education Department data found a double-digit decline in the number of school-aged children who read for fun almost every day, with the share of 13-year-olds who regularly read for pleasure down almost half since 2012. What do you think?
The post Study: Reading For Fun Down Among Schoolchildren
The post Elderly Man Uses Library To Print Out Pornography appeared first on The Onion.
CHICAGO—Anticipating the announcement would rank among the biggest scoops of his career, ESPN senior NBA insider Shams Charania is said to have casually mentioned to his colleagues Tuesday that he was really looking forward to breaking the news of Michael Jordan’s eventual death. “When MJ dies
Sports
University of Cincinnati coach Scott Satterfield expects queries on his former quarterback Brendan Sorsby to increase now that Sorsby has applied for the NFL supplemental draft and his college career is over.
The proposed golf ball rollback spearheaded by the United States Golf Association and R&A will now take place as a single-date implementation in January 2030.
A gulf remains between restricted free agent center Walker Kessler and the Jazz after Utah put an offer worth roughly $140 million over five years on the table, sources told ESPN.
Caitlin Clark announced her first signature shoe -- the Caitlin 1 -- on Wednesday afternoon.
The Golden Knights promoted Ryan Craig, who coached their AHL affiliate, to lead their NHL team Wednesday after moving on from John Tortorella a day earlier.
Olympic bronze medalist and world-champion 1,500-meter runner Jenny Simpson collapsed after suffering a medical episode while pacing a mile group at an event in Raleigh, North Carolina, on Tuesday night.
USGA chief championships officer John Bodenhamer said Wednesday they "learned a great deal" from the 2018 U.S. Open playing experience at Shinnecock Hills.
Is Scottie Scheffler still the favorite? How hard will Shinnecock Hills play? We break down what to watch at the 2026 U.S. Open.
The parent company of Sam Adams said its Boston Taproom ran out of the brand's flagship Boston Lager over the weekend because Scotland soccer fans drank four times as much as it typically sells.
How to Bet on England vs. Croatia With DraftKings, FanDuel, BetMGM and More.
Bettors are splashing down cash on the USMNT ahead of its matchup with Australia, putting the books in a tough spot. Patrick Everson explains.
Compare the best Tennessee sportsbooks and betting apps for 2026. Learn how to sign up, claim sportsbook promos, and legally bet on sports in TN.
FOX Sports' Joel Klatt takes a look at his favorite over/under win totals ahead of the 2026 college football season.
Here are my latest power rankings for the 2026 FIFA World Cup.
Stay up to date on Missouri sports betting. Learn the latest on launch timelines, sportsbooks, and what to expect when it goes live in the Show-Me State.
Compare the best Colorado sportsbooks and their promos. Learn how to sign up, claim sportsbook promos, and legally bet on sports in CO.
Here are seven key storylines to watch for the remainder of the 2026 INDYCAR season.
Plenty of stars being their World Cup quest on Wednesday, including Cristiano Ronaldo and Harry Kane.
Cristiano Ronaldo has long defied the traditional aging process of elite athletes, and fellow former Manchester United forward Teddy Sheringham believes the Portuguese icon is nowhere near finished.
Tech
Anthropic's tools are getting chummy with each other.
Here's what to expect when the manufacturer stops supporting your smart fridge.
In Shenzhen, workers at IO-AI Tech control humanoid robots using a VR rig reminiscent of Ready Player One.
From Amazon's “Off Campus” to Netflix’s upcoming “Icebreakers,” the recent spate of hetero-hockey romances shows Hollywood learned the wrong lessons from “Heated Rivalry.”
The highest capacity Optimus GX Pro 850P drive for the PS5 almost tops the $3,000 mark.
Trump administration officials tell WIRED that if Anthropic wants to rerelease Fable 5, it will need to ensure the model's guardrails can't be circumvented. Security experts say that can't be done.
Carvana is converting old car dealerships into test drive centers.
Every new game we played at Summer Games Fest 2026
Not quite the Grand Theft Auto news everyone's been waiting for, but we'll take it.
Lego's newest set is a fully functional miniature pinball machine.
If you've been feeling shamed or annoyed by the question popping up during your binge-watching sessions, here's how to turn off the feature.
Arriving six years after Google’s last smart speaker, the new HomePod-style device was redesigned to play host to Gemini’s chatbot.
Upgrades include 360-degree audio and deeper integration with Google's Gemini.
We’ve trawled the depths of Amazon to find the best deals on gear we’ve tested.
Smart mowers are an expensive alternative to old-fashioned yard work, but they’re finally good enough to consider if you’d rather sip an iced tea and watch a robot tame your lawn.
They’re much more recyclable than the current plastic ones, and they will still probably be locked away behind that anti-theft plexiglass.
I’ve been reviewing laptops for over a decade, and this is my advice on how to find the right laptop for you.
The White House app will be automatically loaded onto DHS staff's work phones, Politico said.
Temperatures have climbed up to 45 degrees Fahrenheit above normal, stopping ice from forming in the dead of Antarctic winter.
Infowars’ would-be creative director talks Sandy Hook, comedy’s MAGA turn, and why the future of satire may look more like a streaming startup than a late-night show.
Entertainment
Lil Nas X is giving fans a rare health update ... and by the sounds of it, he's in a much better place after a stint in rehab. The rapper resurfaced on social media Wednesday and revealed he's spent the last several months focusing on himself ....…
Jenny Simpson -- a bronze medal-winning Olympic track star -- collapsed during a race in North Carolina this week and needed CPR to restart her heart, according to officials, who say she's now being treated at a local hospital. The terrifying…
Jordyn Woods is reaping the benefits of the New York Knicks' championship run -- her accessory company announced the "lucky bag" she brought to every game is completely sold out due to "unprecedented demand." Woods was superstitious while…
Faizon Love has been arrested on two contempt-of-court charges ... TMZ has learned. According to booking records, the veteran actor was arrested Tuesday in Hillsborough County, Florida, and booked into a Tampa jail. Faizon posed for a mug shot,…
The person killed in the tragic Texas plane crash has been identified ... and he's even being honored by folks at the highest reaches of government. Joshua Baer -- a prominent tech and finance mogul who has been called the godfather of Austin,…
More legal drama on the set of “Matlock” ... this time, a staffer on the show is dragging the creator and a couple of writers to court for allegedly creating a hostile work environment. TMZ has obtained a lawsuit filed Wednesday by John Lowe,…
We want you to be a part of TMZ, so every weekday, between 10:30 AM and 12:00 PM PT, we take you inside our newsroom via live stream. You never know what you're gonna get ... a big story that breaks, an argument erupts in the room, or someone's…
Jose Alvarado seems down for a trip to President Trump's White House -- the newly crowned champion tells TMZ Sports if that's what the Knicks want to do, he'll be there too!! We caught up with the 28-year-old guard leaving the iHeart studios in NYC…
Daveigh Chase -- the former child actress -- is dead ... TMZ has learned. The actress' boyfriend, Roy Hernandez, tells TMZ ... Daveigh died Tuesday from meningitis and an infection in her blood, which caused her to have septic issues and led to her…
A Florida couple who gave birth through IVF were shocked to learn the baby isn't genetically theirs ... but they still want to be her mother and father ... and they've struck a deal with the biological parents. Here's the deal ... Tiffany Score and…
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