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• Jailed Wall Street Journal reporter Evan Gershkovich denied detention appeal in Moscow
• Putin visits Russian troops at military headquarters in Kherson
• Watch moment WSJ journalist appears in Russian court
Pope Leo XIV's historic France visit includes a private meeting with abuse victims in Lourdes and a Saturday Mass expecting up to 1 million people.
Estonia's foreign minister tells Fox News Digital that intelligence sees no Russian buildup for a NATO invasion despite rising hybrid attack fears.
Club for Growth's memo urges Republicans to blame federal expansion for high cost of living and resist subsidies ahead of the November midterms.
Alleigha Botner testified about Caleb Flynn's eerie remark after Ashley Flynn's death and the final messages exchanged before the shooting.
Fast-food breakfast and the drive-thru have become daily rituals for millions of Americans. A food historian reveals how this once-novel concept became an everyday staple.
Test your knowledge of this week’s headlines, including an attorney controversy and a pocketknife discovered by TSA officers in Dallas.
WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert is now discussing transgender-player eligibility, but the league still won't define who qualifies as a woman.
Americans spent over $113 billion on lottery tickets in 2024, yet Powerball and Mega Millions offer some of the worst odds in all of gambling.
Ground beef hit a record $6.92 per pound as the U.S. cattle herd falls to a 75-year low, and Trump signed executive orders targeting beef industry reform.
Byron Donalds attacks David Jolly's shifting stances on abortion, immigration and drilling, calling them political convenience in Florida's governor race.
Satire
GALILEE — The disciples of Jesus of Nazareth got a big laugh after one of their own turned out to be a giant loser who couldn't even cast one demon out of a kid.
DENVER, CO — A major airline company announced that it had carefully considered all its employees and made sure that the most heavily accented person would make all gate announcements for passengers in the terminal.
U.S. — The Babylon Bee is excited to publicly release our first official staff photo in five years, with a huge thanks to the expert visual media team from Stanford University who made it possible.
While the Evergreen State is most famous as the setting for the hit NBC sitcom Frasier, actual people live there, too. Could you be the next one to call it home?
HEAVEN — A representative of Heaven confirmed on Thursday that people who line the dashboards of their Jeeps with little duckies will not inherit the kingdom of God.
LONDON—In a damning memoir filled with explosive claims about her brutal treatment by the House of Windsor, Diana, the former Princess of Wales, has at long last given the public a firsthand account of her disturbing experiences living with the British royal family. “So many unfounded rumors hav
WASHINGTON—Marveling at how his American counterpart’s grasp of the difficult language had progressed, Chinese leader Xi Jinping told reporters Thursday that he was deeply impressed with how much President Donald Trump’s English had improved since the two last met. “He definitely isn’t f
GRAPEVINE, TX — Local toddler Harlan Carter confidently insisted to his mother that he absolutely did not need to go potty before getting in the car for a two-hour drive.
OWASSO, OK — It was total amateur hour at First Baptist Church of Owasso as so-called "Pastor" Darren Parsons didn't even make each of his sermon points start with the same letter.
LOS ANGELES—Sounding a loud buzzer to signal that the pop stars were now permitted to leave the dance studio, Hybe x Geffen record executives were seen Thursday releasing Katseye for their daily half hour of yard time. “We make sure our global girl group members get a solid 30 minutes of outdoor
WASHINGTON—Reflecting on the past fling and remarking how time had flown by, local golden retriever Daisy told reporters Thursday that she could not believe the guy she hooked up with 10 years ago was now the head of the FBI. “I remember seeing him on TV and thinking, ‘No, that can’t be Kash
WASHINGTON, D.C. — In preparation for an historic dinner with Chinese President Xi Jinping, President Donald Trump ordered White House kitchen staff to slaughter the fattened cat.
Primetime star Robert Pattinson is receiving widespread acclaim for his portrayal of To Catch A Predator host Chris Hansen. The Onion sat down with the actor to discuss his craft, his career, and what’s next. The Onion : What creative liberties did you take with the role of Chris Hansen? Pattins
CHICAGO—Saying the man promised visitors access to the “real show,” onlookers confirmed Thursday that a guy outside the Barack Obama Presidential Center was selling cheaper tickets to something called “Barry’s Magical Experience.” “Why waste your time at a freaking snoozefest library w
The post USDA Replaces Food Stamps With One Giant Rutabaga appeared first on The Onion.
A 74-year-old hunter was arrested on felony manslaughter charges after fatally shooting a woman whom he mistook for a deer. What do you think?
The post Hunter Arrested After Mistaking Woman For A Deer appeared first on The Onion.
ST. LOUIS—Kicking himself for missing out on a potentially lucrative financial opportunity, local man Keith Towers reportedly realized this week that he might have become rich if he had invested in rice 7,000 years ago. “Damn, I wish I’d had the foresight to put some money down on rice back in
Sports
Bijan Robinson and Drake London couldn't be stopped, as Atlanta ended Green Bay's streak of 13 straight home-opening wins.
Which soccer players are actually worth £100m? Let's assess each team's stars, factoring in ability, positions, contracts and age.
Barcelona attacking midfielder Dani Olmo is on the radar of Bayern Munich. Transfer Talk has the latest.
The first round of the 2026 WNBA playoffs opens Sunday. The semifinals tip Oct. 4 and the Finals open Oct. 17.
After a chaotic final night of the season, the WNBA playoff bracket is set! Here's how it happened.
At long last, the bracket is finally set. Here are the strengths and potential flaws for all eight teams.
Which wild cards could win it all? Are the Yankees cooked without Judge? Here's what those in the sport think could decide October.
From current playoff matchups to league races to the postseason schedule, we have everything you need to know.
The Packers are off to their worst start in coach Matt LaFleur's eight seasons after they were booed off Lambeau Field on Thursday night.
Playing for nothing but pride, the Sun prevailed 95-81 in their final game before the franchise's impending relocation to Houston, marking the final moments of the organization's 24-season history with celebration and joy.
A look at MLB's standings and how they are informing the postseason picture.
Matt LaFleur is firmly on the hot seat, and other takeaways from the Falcons' dominating win over the Packers.
Here's the latest from around the NFL on Thursday.
Dontrelle Willis and Eric Karros share their predictions ahead of MLB's postseason.
The Brewers extended their best-ever regular season with their first-ever 100th win. A number of MLB teams have still never reached triple digits, though.
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There's a chance your 0-2 team can make the playoffs, but it's pretty slim. So, which 0-2 team is the most likely to beat the odds? We each made our picks, and a common answer emerged.
Justin Herbert enters an uphill battle to keep the Chargers' season alive this weekend against the Bills.
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Tech
Lance Oppenheim’s new film doesn’t paint Chris Hansen as a hero. The To Catch a Predator host's real-world copycats are even more reckless.
The built-in tools on your phone—as well as some inexpensive apps—let you share whatever you’re doing with others.
From electric trucks to health trackers, women designers are guiding consumer tech to a better place.
A quarter-century ago, Borsook published a wildly prophetic, penetrating book about Silicon Valley called Cyberselfish. Then she disappeared.
Dads are typically tough to shop for. Let me help with these WIRED-tested gift ideas.
A Nevada event aimed at a niche audience of fleet managers could mark a milestone in clean transportation.
We tried dozens of the best coffee subscriptions to find freshly roasted, delicious coffee for every taste.
Shop the latest beauty trends and save big using an Ulta promo code for beauty tech, makeup, and more.
Keep your memories alive without breaking the bank by using these top Chatbooks coupon codes and saving strategies.
Upgrade your home for less with these verified Maytag discount codes, military savings, and limited-time closeout offers on washers, dryers, and more.
No more Beavis and Butt-Head in your matches.
Meta's newest smart glasses are an iterative, expensive update.
It's easy to win when the defendant is a no-show.
The biopic arrives on Prime Video in November.
Another big overhaul to the game is now due in March.
The app is getting a "hands-free" mode that can narrate recipe steps.
It was directed by Alex Gibney, who has made films about Enron, Scientology and Elizabeth Holmes.
The state now has illegal gambling charges underway against four of these businesses.
It's an experiment to see how the chips hold up in the harsh vacuum of the cosmos.
Official Nintendo designs and RGB lighting give the Rematch an adorable edge.
Entertainment
Elizabeth Holmes is barred from reaching out to the many investors she was convicted of ripping off -- to the tune of over $452 million -- once she gets out of federal prison ... TMZ has learned. According to court documents, obtained by TMZ,…
The MTV Video Music Awards is goin' down on Sunday, and before we bust out this year's hottest stars in music, we're taking a trip back to 2001, when Britney Spears famously hit the stage with a very ssspecial guest. Check out the gallery -- Before…
Calling all you mighty Millennials, ballin' Boomers, groovy Gen X-ers, and everyone else ... we're tappin' y'all into Gen Z's hottest stories of the week, packed with sexy stars and piping-hot news! Tap-In to the gallery ... we're spillin' it…
After a media whirlwind, the holdout juror in Lindsay Clancy's murder trial is ready to get back to work and business as usual, TMZ has learned. Michael Desronvil's lawyer, Edward Andrew Paltzik, tells TMZ ... Michael's been "laying low" since the…
The District Attorney who investigated Nolan Wells' death fired back at the late teen’s family lawyer Ben Crump ... hours after he held a press conference with alleged new evidence. Jackson County District Attorney Angel Myers McIlrath criticized…
Authorities are investigating the death of 4-year-old Jayde Wooten who was found upside down in a trash can full of water and fish. According to WGXA, the girl's father told a deputy that he'd just gotten home and couldn't find his daughter in her…
A Pennsylvania man who shot his ex-wife five times during a brutal attack sparked by child support has been convicted of attempted murder ... and prosecutors say he showed little remorse, even portraying himself as a hero in court. Darrell Long --…
Looks like Ed Sheeran will have to pull the plug on his two concerts at Robert Kraft's NFL stadium after all, but with all the controversy swirling around after Macklemore's firing ... it's actually Mother Nature forcing Ed's hand. The singer was…
Brandi Glanville fans can now have unfettered access to the steamy star ... or rather, an A.I. version of her -- who's programmed to do a whole lotta naughty things ... and who doesn't have any health issues. The former 'Real Housewives' star has…
Milania Giudice is getting professional care and support following her emotional airport meltdown amid a mental health crisis and reported suicidal thoughts ... TMZ has learned. "She is currently surrounded by people who love her and is under the…
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